before

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Three months before

"You never listen, do you Alaska!?" My mom yelled. I backed up fearfully into the corner of my room, looking down at my shoes as I felt my back press into the drywall in attempt to find inspiration for some sort of witty comeback. Nothing.

"Art is not something you should be focused on! Nor is dance. I've told you so many times why you can't take those classes anymore! Not only is it a waste of money, but it takes away from your scholar capabilities. 150% of your focus should be on school. You are representing your dad and I's name for Pete's sake!" She yelled again.

I heard vicious footsteps up the stairs. It was my dad. He had a tuxedo on and was adjusting his tie as he came in the room.

"What's going on here? Alaska, your room is a mess by the way. Didn't I tell you to clean it up yesterday?" My dad rolled his eyes as he continued to fix his tie.

"Dad I was so busy planning things I'm sorry I didn't get to it. You're going away anyways why does it matter?" I didn't make eye contact.

"Planning what?" He raised his voice.

"It's because you're distracted you're forgetting things. You know as a Lawyer you can't forget things. You have to be on top of your game every. single. day. And don't start with me with the that's not possible shit, because your father and I are walking, breathing, living examples of successful people who are on top of their game every day." She said.

"Mom I don't even want to go into law." Before I could continue she cut me off.

"Then what else would you do? Hm?" She said.

"... Art.. I finished Junior and Senior year with a 97 average in Visual Art and won the Arts award at graduation. Which you wouldn't have known about it because you didn't show up that day!" I was seeing red.

"Art is not a career. It is merely a childish hobby! Alaska I know very well you won that award because it haunts me every day I pass it in the hall. It's just a daily reminder that my daughter didn't work hard enough to win Valedictorian or an award that is non-superficial." She snapped at me. I could feel tears coming.

"Don't you cry! You brought this upon yourself! Your father and I work our asses off so we can live the way we do. Be thankful for that." She added. My father stepped in.

"Alaska, your marks are great, better than probably anyone at your high school. Why would you want to throw all that away by pursuing art? It's a waste. A complete and utter waste of intellectual talent. Any law school in the world would take you. Why don't you embrace that opportunity?!" My dad exclaimed.

"Because it's not what I want to do with my life." I replied. "After all it is my life, right? I'm not so sure anymore. You tell me." I stepped forward courageously as I stood up to my parents.

My mom stood forward, to remind me who was in charge in this house. She looked me in the eyes, and slapped me right across the face. I inhaled sharply and took in what just happened.

"You don't ever speak to your parents like that." My mom was practically hissing.

"Who taught you to speak like that? Probably your friends' trashy parents. Uh-huh, that's where it came from." She said. Tears were running down my face by this point all while my dad was combing his hair.

My mom looked at her wrist, more specifically at her custom Michael Kors watch to check the time.

"We have to go. Our flight is soon. Alaska, Your credit card is linked with mine so there should be no shortage of money as long as you're using it responsibly. We won't be back until before March break. You're old enough to take care of yourself... I think. Now tell me what I want to hear."

I purposely wanted to get a rise out of her, so with pride I told her what I chose to do.

"Well I was accepted into Cornell, and Cardozo law," Her eyes lit up.

"But I didn't take those offers. So I chose NYU, Institute of Fine Arts." I smiled proudly.

"You what?!" My dad had to hold her back from cutting my throat out with her bare hands.

"Yep. The envelope is sealed. I'm moving out in September to start at an Art School." I looked at her with arrogance. Courage was on my side today.

"You think you can outsmart your own mother hey? I don't think so." Her anger was replaced with cattiness. I gulped.

"My executive assistant's nephew is part of the board at Cardozo. I'll email them today at the airport and I'll have you transferred by October. That is final. It will be no problem because I have the money, the connections, and you have the grades. No daughter of mine is going to waste their time and my money on a hobby. As long as we make the payments, we are in charge. You hear me?" I couldn't take in what was just happening. My world was crashing down on me. I couldn't breathe and my heart was in my throat.

"Are you deaf child? I said You hear me?!" She yelled in my face, bearing her fangs at me.

"I hear you." I whispered.

"Pardon?" She said. She heard me but she wanted me to say it louder.

"I said, I hear you." I responded louder with aggression. Her response was a snarky smile to tell anyone in the room that she won this fight. As she always does.

"Wendy, we have to go now." My dad said.

"Yes, of course sweetie. Let's go now." She responded.

My dad grabbed my mom's waist before dragging her out of my room. They both laughed with excitement for their upcoming Europe business trip.

"Don't miss us too much Alaska!" She said with a smile. But it wasn't genuine. And that was it. I wiped the tears off my face, fell into my bed and screamed into my pillow. My eyeliner and eyeshadow was smeared onto the cashmere. My perfect, polished cashmere, soiled. And I didn't care.

*******************************************

"Conduct, subject to disciplinary action, for a University employee to engage in sexual activity with any enrolled student of the institution, other than his or her spouse."

          Something I should have definitely
     payed attention to before doing what I did.
                                   My bad.

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