A Reason to Live||Eren x Reader

⋆Chapter Nine⋆A Revealed Past⋆

After the whole conversation you had listened to involving the trio that originated from your home area, you found yourself heading back to the female sleeping quarters, a light sigh leaving your lips as you rubbed at your eyes, which still appeared slightly glossy and a little red from the small appearance of your tears. You nearly dragged your feet behind you as you did so, the exhaustion creeping in.

You ignore it as you hear footsteps from behind you, until you hear your name and the sudden pull of your arm. "[First Name]."

"Jaeger." You greet, and you can feel the grip on your arm loosen as you call him by his last name, rather than his first. But his arm remains there a few moments. When it becomes too much, you turn around to speak, but he beats you to it. "Can we... talk?" He asks a little hesitantly and you frown slightly, not sure what he would have to talk to you about, but you give a nod anyway. "Make it quick, I'm tired."

Eren only gives his own nod before he's moving to lead you away, and to somewhere the two of you could talk alone, you being silent the whole time he leads you. Once you're far enough, you pull your arm away, "Alright, we're alone." You start, "What did you want to talk about?"

"I just... I want to know, is it true?" You cast him a confused look and he bites his lip for a moment before he continues. "Is it true that you plan to enlist in the Survey Corps?" After several moments of just standing there, you give a nod, but remain silent, even as he asks his next question. "Why?"

Seeing that you weren't answering, he takes a shaky breath before he goes on, "Then I'll tell you why I want to enlist..." He trailed off, taking a deep breath before he began to speak, "Truth be told... I've always wanted to be a scout, even before Maria fell..." He trailed off again, rather hesitant to continue. "I was just... tired, tired of not being able to do anything... tired of just sitting back and doing nothing... and to explore outside the walls, I didn't want to be confined anymore."

You listen intently, hand subconsciously travelling to your locket as his reason was so similar to yours... You glance up in surprise once you notice he's clenching his fist and now refusing to meet your gaze. "-and then... when everything went to hell, my mother, she..." You can tell he's keeping back tears from the way his body shaking and before you can think, you're reaching to gently touch his clenched hand and he relaxes slightly, but he's still tense.

"I watched her... one of those damned bastards ate my mother while I had to watch... and I was powerless to do anything... From that day-" He suddenly looked up, meeting your gaze, his own look hard, even as you can see his eyes glossed over. "-that I would kill them all... that all the titans would die, that I would slaughter them, they... they don't..." His voice trailed off and he takes a shaky breath. "Eren." You start, silently telling him by your look that he doesn't have to continue.

He only gives a nod, but looks on in surprise as you step back, your next words. "I'll tell you my reason." You give a faint smile, but it quickly drops as you stand there. "Like you, I wanted to enlist before the colossal ever attacked... before Maria was breached by titans. I wanted to... to be like my big brother." A look crossed your face, another smile - but it fell with your next sentence. "But... his third expedition, he didn't come back... There was nothing left except his bloody, ripped cloak."

Tears are already springing to your eyes, but you quickly blink them away, "My father... he was a soldier, too, I don't know where he is right now... He stopped talking to me and my mother... and she..." The tears are pooling in your eyes now as you stand there, own hands shaking slightly and Eren notices, but says nothing. "...she was eaten, right before I got to her. I want to avenge both her and [Brother Name], b-but... I have n-no one left..." 

As Eren moves to take a step forward, you step back, smiling slightly as the first tear drips down your face as your eyes can't take it anymore. Before long, you are falling to your knees as you hug yourself, you had been keeping it in for so long... so Why did you tell Eren of all people? Why him? Why were you letting him see you breakdown like this?

Your breath hitches as your [Eye Color] orbs widen the moment you feel a pair of arms wrap around you and your body is still shaking, "I'm sorry for asking..." Is all he says as he tightens the embrace, you can feel whatever walls you had built crash completely as you wrap your arms around him in return and bury your face in the side of his neck.

Eventually you quiet down and it's enough to hear his sniffles, "E-Eren-" You start, but he cuts you off as his voice sounds slightly choked itself, as he forces his own tears back, it was then that you noticed how his own body was trembling. "I'm going to kill them all... I'll avenge them... We'll take back humanity in their honor!"