Chapter 24

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All I wanted was some pizza

I was more tired over the next few days. The weekend was consumed by my workouts. I got a few calls to hang out, but I buried myself in physical activity. Everything from morning sprints to chugging loads of ice cream with my mom while watching chick flicks. She didn't know the full story that I told my father, but that was for the best. "Your mom wants grandkids, Jake. I know that this is all new and confusing for you, but right now isn't the best time to bring this up with her. Settle your situation and come to a conclusion before you drop any bombs on her, ok?" father had asked right before my mom came home that night. So all she knew was that I was having 'relationship issues' which seemed to be enough for her.

Going to school on Monday was another story. I literally had to drag myself out of bed and took an hour to get dressed. I looked like crap in my opinion, but that felt appropriate. Of course, Hunter wasn't at school, and there was a substitute for Miss Sin. I felt crazy every time I thought about him. We didn't even see each other every day. Yet knowing he was gone, and I could have done something made it feel worse.

"Psst! I'm pretty sure the new hotty has a thing for you." Amy tried her best to whisper, but she might as well have been shouting in the quiet art room. She was referring to Nicholas who had literally turned his seat and canvas so that he faced me. There was a 50% chance that he was painting Amy next to me, but for some reason I doubted it. "I'm pretty sure he bats for the other team if you know what I mean. Oh god, can you imagine if he made a move on you?" I immediately flashed back to the night he walked into the bedroom shirtless. A small fire lit up in my cheeks and I prayed Amy wouldn't notice.

Of course, she did, "Oh my sparkling god! No!" her voice dropped an octave for that last word. Her teenage fangirl drive had taken over her brain and it was too late to stop her. "He already did!? When, where, how, did you like it?" F*ck my life! Heads were turning our way. "I thought you had a thing with Miss S. They're both so beautiful though, so I can see why you would want both. You've got to tell me everything! Especially how much happened with black lightning over there." I turned my head away from her in shame and got a glance of Nicholas smirking up a storm. The embarrassment was so complete and total that I nearly got up and walked out of the room. Instead, I let my defensive wall raise higher.

"Amy, please. No questions during class." I said it in a way that even she could tell was final. At the end of class, I heard a strange cough before I got up to leave. Nicholas had turned his canvas to show me his drawing. I froze when I saw the masterpiece he'd drawn. The bright blends of blue and silver filled the painted sky with an incredible beauty. Upon an intricately sculpted border of gold and black swirls, rested a portrait of myself. It was perfect and flawless to the point where I knew it was 1000% better than the original. My raven black hair had reflective shine and my pale brown eyes were bold and intense. The drawing itself was beyond words; far better than anything I'd ever seen in person. "Wow."

Nick walked over to me while I was gaping at his drawing. "I thought I could show you the way you appear to me. What do you think?" I thought it was amazing. Anyone who looked like that would be a prize worth pursuing; That if I looked anything like that, Hunter might not have been so prepared to leave me behind. I shook my head and turned to the exit.

"I think that's nothing like me. You need eye surgery." That wasn't the last advance that Nicholas Blake made on me, however. For the rest of the week, he seemed hell bent on being incredible. At lunch, he was this unstoppable thief that stole my food and carried it to whatever table I headed for. During the classes we shared, he became this valuable wealth of information and resource that made him the ideal assignment partner. Even my private training sessions with coach Clinton ended up being much less private because he was always around cheering me on like a performer. It wasn't long before the guy felt like a regular fixture in my life.

"Can I kiss you?"

"No!"

"Would you stop me if I tried?"

"Hell yeah!"

"What if I ran away after I did it?"

"I'd find a way to quickscope you." That was one of many answers I gave to his unstoppable flirting. If it wasn't obvious before, Nick had no sense of restraint when it came to doing what he wanted. He openly made moves on me in between classes and sometimes during as well. I had to keep my guard up at every moment around him because I knew he would seize any openings I gave him. It was at the end of that week when I finally decided to confront him on his persistence. "You aren't the first guy in the world to have a crush on someone you know. I'm pretty sure almost everyone in the school has someone they like. But you may notice, that you're the only one going so hard over someone."

"That's not true. I've seen quite a few of the freshmen and sophomores getting hard during the girl's cheerleading performances. Plus, I'm pretty sure I do a better job of hiding that part of me than they do." He said smugly while leaning against my locker. It was time to go home, but he was already offering to give me a ride.

"Damn it, Nick! You know what I meant. It doesn't hurt to hold back your feelings a little bit. Everyone does it, that's just how the world works." I scolded him as harshly as I could.

"The world is stupid. I'm not. It does hurt to hold back, even if you don't think about it. I don't want to regret keeping things to myself later when I can choose to speak now. Haven't you ever had a moment where you really wished that you could go back in time and speak up more for yourself?" I didn't answer him. "I don't care what everyone else is doing. They aren't my concerns."

"Then what are your concerns, Nick? Am I some prize you've set up for winning? Does anything matter to you, or do you just obey every idea that pops into that pretty little head of yours?" crap...wrong choice of words. He smiled and raised an eyebrow in a very familiar way.

"My sister is my concern. My family name is another one. Then there's you and everything that you want. You should give me a bit of credit at least, don't you think? I'm stronger than you are, and a lot faster. If I was just crushing on you, I could steal a kiss and dash away before you noticed I was near. But I ask you instead because I want you to accept me first. I want you to give in to me exactly as you are." He was impossible. How could anyone reason with someone that stubborn?

"I can't deal with you right now. I'm just too tired." I made a dismissing gesture while walking away. I took a less crowded route through the school to get out of the building undetected. I was rewarded with a long walk through an empty hall that was so quiet my footsteps echoed against the walls. It was a mistake.

Suddenly the walls felt like they were opening up wider and fading away. The hall felt like it was extending for miles, and my pulse started going wild. Then it happened; the one thing I didn't want to feel. Hunter's gaze vanished entirely and I was completely alone on every level. It was like a hand that had been holding me up for weeks was suddenly pulled out from under me. Memories that had no place in my life started coming back to haunt me. The room felt so big and empty now that my legs caved in and I fell to the floor. My heart was pounding in my chest so violently that I clutched my ribs, just hoping that I could keep it from exploding out of my chest. I didn't want to feel this again, not after so many years.

Seconds, or minutes, maybe hours went by with me just holding myself in the endlessly large room. It felt like if I let go of myself, then I'd be swept away and never return. Relief came in the form of a foreign vibration. My phone was ringing and it was Chad on the line. Picking myself up was easier now as I answered the phone. "Yo, Jake! If you're still around the school, come grab a slice with the team." It took a second for me to strengthen my voice before speaking again.

"Ah, sure. I'll meet you at the shop." I said casually. I took off running. Forget the walls, and the rooms, and the halls. All I wanted was some pizza.



Were you surprised? Jake's past isn't so simple after all. You may want to look up the words Agoraphobic and Autophobia. If you recall an earlier conversation he had with Hunter, you may remember a few weird things that he mentioned which didn't mean what you think they did. You may have also noticed that Jake never said he hated being watched honestly. Now that he's truly alone, what will happen in this story? leave a comment and tell me what you think ;) 

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