Being a Sugg

28

~3 days later~

"Tori why don't you go back to the house and get some rest. I'm going. You need a shower." Joe says and I look up at him with a sigh.

"Fine." I respond and he holds out his hand. I take it and kiss my dads head before making my way out the hospital doors. Joe drives us back to the house and right away I get into the shower. I change into a different pair of sweats and a tank top, with a cozy cardigan over it. I fall back into my bed and smell Dans familiar cologne still lingering on the sheets.

I hadn't heard from him since the fight. I had tried reaching out to him but he would either ignore it or not respond. With a sigh, I slip under my covers and feel myself fall into a deep sleep.

When I wake up, unsure of the time, I'm being shaken by joe.

"Cmon we gotta get to the hospital." Joe says quickly. I jump out of bed quickly out of fear.

"Is there something wrong?" I ask, running down the stairs.

"No but they're taking dad into surgery soon and suggested that we go see him before." Joe says and I sigh in relief.

"You scared me!" I yell before punching him in the arm. He winces and I begin to tie my shoes up. Joe and I slip on our coats and begin heading to the car.

"Here I grabbed you this." Joe says handing me a granola bar.

"No thanks I'm good." I say before slipping into the passenger seat. He sits in the drivers and holds it out for me again.

"Cmon Tor. You need to eat."

"I did when you were sleeping!" I shout back and he sighs and sticks it into the cup holder.

I'm lying, I didn't eat, but I'm scared I'll puke if I do. Everything has been too much for me. Everything with my dad, dan, everything. I haven't posted a video for what feels like forever and all my fans are worried but I can't do anything. I'm too numb for anything anymore.

"We're here." Joe says softly, taking me out from my deep thought. I gulp and unbuckle, grab my vlogging camera I brought and hold it out in front of me. The viewfinder showed a broken girl who hadn't seen a good sleep in days, with her hair a muss and clothes wrinkled.

"Hi guys it's Tori. I know I haven't posted in a while but a very very bad thing has happened. My father, the one we all know and love, has a... a... I don't even know in his head but he doesn't remember me." I say before sniffling and wiping a tear from my eye.

"Ummm. It's on and off, one day he will remember me and another he won't, but he's going into surgery now and we're here to say goodbye. Zoe is in there now and me and joe ran home to get some rest but now we're back so... yeah." I say blandly, before turning off the camera. Joe looks at me with the saddest expression I've ever seen on his face. He reaches over and hugs me tightly, but I push him away and get out of the car, slamming the door behind me.

I hurry away from him, getting into an elevator and watching it close as he walks through the hospital doors.

Once I reach dads room, I walk in to see all the machines he was hooked into, with Zoe holding his hand and running her thumb in circles on his palm. She looks up at me, gives a small smile then stands up, leaving the room for me to be alone with dad.

Please remember me today

My dad turns to me and flashes a genuine smile.

"Tori baby! I missed you." He says, weakly and slowly lifting his arms up to hug me. I push back my tears and run to his arms, cuddling up against him.

"W-why am I here?" He asks me, pulling away from the hug. I'm hesitant at first but I decide just to tell him.

"Y-you have something in your brain they need to take out." I say then watch his face go pale.

"I-is t-that w-w-why m-my...." he starts before his eyeballs roll to the back of his head and his mouth drops open. My eyes widen and I jump up. The heart monitor goes flat and I let out a horror movie scream.

"NURSE! SOMEONE! HELP!" I shout, pushing every button that says emergency on it. Suddenly, people begin rushing in, a man pushing me back into the hallway. They close the door just before shocking my father, me being slightly grateful I wasn't able to see it.

"What happened?" Zoe says crying out of shock.

"I-I think he's d-dying." I say shakily. Zoe grabs me before I can fall and she cries into my hair. Joe stood there silently staring at the door blankly.

That was when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turn around to see the man I missed the most.

"Dan." I shutter, collapsing into his arms and him grasping onto me for support. He holds me up a bit so my head was in the crook of his neck.

"I'm so sorry I left Tor." He whispers in my ear but I shush him.

"It's ok. You're here now." I reply. When all finally felt calm is when all hell broke loose.

"Time of death 8:07." I faintly heard through the closed door. I jump out of dans arms and run up to the door, looking through the small window to see doctors packing up equipment and a women writing my dads time of death down on a paper that means other to her, but everything to us.

"No!" I screech out, barging through the door. "There has to be something else. He can't be dead. This all happened so fast there has to be something else." I cry out, but a doctor just lays a hand on my shoulder and gives me a look of pity.

"We tried everything we could."

"Don't give me that rehearsed speech bullshit! If you tried harder he'd still be alive!" I shout, pushing his hand off me and bending down to the floor on my knees.

"It's ok baby." Dans soothing voice whispers in my ear as he sits beside me and pulls me onto his lap, cradling me like a baby. "Everything happens for a reason." Dan adds, rubbing circles on my thigh.

"I'm just happy he got to meet you. Thankyou so much for being there for me. I know I'm a mess." I cry out.

"A beautiful mess."