Adoption of Love (NARRY)

Confusion

Author note: I've talked to my co-writer and it looks like this is going to be rated R.... the event that makes it rated R will be later on. And sorry for any mistakes.

HARRY POV

I lay in my bed on top of the covers. What's happening to me? Why did I say that? Why am I being so mean? These thoughts swim around in my head as I listen to Ed Sheeran's Homeless.

Its not a homless life for me

I'm just home less than I'd like to be

I jump from the bed and turn off the radio. Those lyrics may as well ve coming from Niall's mouth. I mean he didn't ask to be put in the system. How did it happen?

   I mentally face palm myself. GOD HARRY! You were so wrapped up in making sure you didn't get close to the Irishman that you left while he was pouring out the answer.

      But it sounded sad and he didn't want to hear about how Niall was treated unfairly. He deserves to be treated like a prince. Wait Harry, why are you feeling this way?

    Because, Harry you are worried what might happen if you admit that you're gay (or bi) and Niall is to innocent and sweet to have to suffer through shit. But, maybe, just maybe you are scared that you might hurt the blonde.

I lay back down and stare at the ceiling of my room. I ponder on my thoughts, but can't come to a conclusion. Am I just not wanting to accept my sexuality and my feelings for Niall? Or are my feelings some sort of hormone driven reaction in your teenage body? I'm eighteen years old, why would my hormones be acting up?

      A rumble of thunder erupts from outside followed by a flash of light. Huh... must be a storm. I close my eyes and listen to the incoming storm.

     Suddenly footsteps rush up the stairs and go into a room. That's probably Niall. Our rooms are upstairs unlike my mums. (she doesn't like climbing the stairs).

     More thunder blasts and after a whimper sounds from across the hall. Now is that Niall? I get off my bed and open my door. Silently I walk to Niall's room and press my ear to the door. I hear a few whimpers and a sniffle from inside the room. More thunder shudders through the house and his cries grow louder.

      Those cries make me want to hug the little blonde. He's afraid and I want to comfort him. So when I hear him cry out again, I burst through his door without knocking.

"Niall, are you okay?!" I ask kneeling at his bedside.

A blonde head pops out from under the covers. His eyes are puffy and his cheeks are soaked in tears.

"H...Harry?" his watery eyes meet mine.

        "Whats wrong?" I ask. Niall shrieks at another episode of thunder and lightning. He immediately goes back under his blankets.

    "Sh...it's okay, Niall come out so I can talk to you" I say calmly.

"Nu Uh" Niall says.

I chuckle at his childish behavior.

" Fine, if you won't come out, I'll just come in." I slip off my shirt as he peeks out of the blankets.

"You wouldn't dare" he whispers and I slip off my pants, leaving me in my boxers.

   I smirk at him. "Watch me." instantly I jump into the soft bed and Niall's eyes widen as I go under the covers and wrap an arm around his waist.

   "Harry?!" Niall squeaks.

"Niall?!" I mock.

"w...what are you doing?" he asks.

"well... I left when you were telling us your life story and I felt bad." I admit.

Niall looks up at me and I notice his lip is quivering.

"Hey, its okay lets just talk, forget everything outside, okay?" I coo.

He nods.

"so can you tell me why  you're so scared of thunderstorms?" I ask  brushing some of his hair from his angelic face. WTF?! What's gotten into you?

        "Well...umm... when I was around Ten years old and untill I was put up for adoption, my biological brother, Greg, would make me stay outside during storms so his friend that was homeless would stay warm." Niall says.  "And since I was Ten, the dark scared the crap outta me and add loud noises and lighting that makes the shadows look like monsters, then you've got yourself a traumatized kid" he explains.

         "But, what did your biological mother say? And didn't you ever get sick?" I ask, wondering how his brother got away with such a thing.

He nods. "I was always sick, but my B.M. (biological mother) thought Greg was an angel so if he did something bad to me she would say that I deserved it and that was my punishment."

I feel angry with his biological family.  Naill was and is sweet, I mean I haven't given him a real chance, but I get this innocent vibe from him.  I run my free hand through his hair

    What am I doing? I have a reputation, and to keep it I'll have to hurt Niall. Maybe if I warn him, or give him a hint he'll be ready for it and not be as upset as he might be.

"Niall, I want you to know that no matter your past, you never deserve to be treated that way, understand?" I say, but what I don't tell him is that I will hurt hin and dig up anything I can to hurt him.

Niall nods. I shake my head.

  "No, I want you to say okay" I say sternly. He laughs. DAMN! Why is he so adorable?!

   " Okay, and Harry?" he puts his head on my bare chest and looks up at me.

I gulp. "Yeah Niall?"

  "will you stay until I fall asleep?"

Warnings go off in my head telling me to get up and leave, but I ignore them.

"Sure, sleep tight Ni" I say and and a few minutes later I feel his breath on my skin slow down and I know he's asleep.

I'm worried for, not just Niall's sake, but my sake too. While I'm hurting him, it's gonna hurt me. I have to admit that I care about him and that there's a possibility that I am gay.

     Suddenly I feel something change in me. I need to keep some space between us and I'll do anything to do it, even if it sends him crying alone in this room. That means I can't be comforting him or even being friendly to him. It may hurt me at times, but I am a man and I am not a fag!

     I slowly get up from the bed, trying not to wake the sleeping leprechaun and find a piece of paper.

I quickly write Niall a note explaining that I will no longer be doing stuff like this and to expect me to ignore him for, like, ever.

I go back to my room and fall asleep with a strange pain in my chest.

A/N: the co-writer for this story is LIAM_HARRY !