Every Little Thing

Chapter Nineteen

            It’s Sunday, and we’re sitting on the couch in Eric’s shed. I look up from my book to see him staring off into space. 

            “We’ve got school tomorrow," he says, continuing to focus on the wall. I knew he was nervous about it; Jake would be there, too, and Eric and I have been the talk of the school for the whole year. It’s going to be horrific, with all the looks we’ll be thrown tomorrow. I get up from my seat in the arm chair and walk over to him and sit down on his lap, straddling him. His hands automatically go to my hips to hold me in place and I wrap mine around his neck. 

            “You’re worried about it," I say.

            “Jake expects me to keep away from you. He’s got eyes everywhere. I mean, he thinks I’m 100% over you and that I want to move on," he mumbled. I ran my hands through his hair. 

            “Okay," I replied. 

            “Okay?" he repeats, surprised. 

            “Okay; I mean, we’ll just act like strangers in school again. I’d rather have you part time than not at all; but I have one condition," I trail off as I kiss his neck. 

            “Hmm?" 

            “We leave campus for lunch. I can’t keep my hands off of you for that long," I say. I can feel his smile begin to form on his face. 

            “Okay, baby. Whatever you want." 

            We spent the rest of the day cuddling on the couch, which happily kept our minds off the long day that inevitably faced us tomorrow. I missed just being with him; being able to look up and see him running his hand through his hair as he was caught up in a book or watching a movie intently. I’m never going to let him slip through my fingers like that again. 

            He woke up at 4 AM with a nightmare; it wasn’t as bad as the night before, which sparked a little ray of hope. Maybe he can get better. 

            The next morning, I awoke to him stroking my hair and humming contently. I would have given anything to stay there with him. Mornings with him were worth more to me than all of the money in the world. The silence makes me feel like we’re the only two people alive. I helped him get changed and he cooked breakfast. Jake was going to pick him up in his car, so I had to go back into Claire’s house. 

            “Okay, so I’ll meet you in the parking lot at 12, right?" I mummer against his lips at the door. He had his arms wrapped firmly around my waist with his hands in my back pockets. I couldn’t find it in me to leave yet. 

            “Mm hmm. Keep your phone on and I’ll text you," he says softly before he pecks me on the lips. 

            “If you need help with anything, you just call me and I’ll be there in two secon-" I start, but was cut off by him kissing me again. I heard a car start to pull up the long drive way. 

            “Okay, now I have to go!" I say, pulling back. He smiles and waves at me as I run to the house. 

            “I love you!" he screams and I yell it back before swinging the door open and slamming it shut. I rest my back on it and bite my lip to keep in a squeal of excitement because of the rush of happiness I got when I heard him say that. I do a little dance and I look up to see Shane and Claire in the kitchen, Oliver in his high chair, and all three pairs of eyes on me. 

            Oliver lets out a bubble of giggles and Shane starts to laugh, while Claire shakes her head with a smile on her face. 

            “Ha! You owe me ten bucks, honey bunch!" he yells. My mouth fell open. 

            “You two were betting on us?!" 

            “Well… Yeah. Claire was convinced that it’d take at least a week, but I knew you’d walk in here with a shit-eating grin on your face after a few days," he says as he holds his hand out as Claire shoves a ten dollar bill into his palm. 

            “I can’t believe it," I say, making them both laugh. 

            “So, how’d it go? Are you two married yet?" he asks.

            “No," I say as I walk into the kitchen. “Jake is twisting his arm behind his back. He was too scared of him to even look at me, but I think everything’s okay now. No one can know, apart from you guys. We’ve only got one year of school left; it’ll be hard but it’s only a few more months right?" 

            I was wrong. I was so wrong.

            I got to school that morning and I could hear the whispers about me already. I made my way to my locker as I usually did and ripped up whatever stupid note was consistently left there with something taunting my relationship with Eric. I opened it and put my books in. I looked up across the hall to see Eric, looking as handsome as ever, standing with Jake and all his friends. We made eye contact for a brief moment before I looked away shyly. 

            To be honest, him seeing me at this point in my life, how I’ve completely lost all my social value, how I am basically the school’s loser and how purely pathetic I am scurrying around under people’s feet and trying to avoid their gazes terrified me. I was different than the girl that he met last year and I’m afraid he’ll see me as less of the girl that he fell in love with. 

            I can hear all of Jake’s friends making fun of me. I look over to see Jake’s friend, Mary, too close to Eric. She’s just like Jake; a complete meat head who has a head that is thicker than the wheel of a car. She’s whispering something in his ear and I feel a gulf of something over power my body that I’ve never had to feel with Eric: jealously. Jake is watching them from the corner of his eye and my ears are filled with the obviously fake laughs from Eric. I couldn’t do this. He’s mine and only mine. I’m the one who’s seen all of him; I loved him at his worst and I still think he’s the best. The bell rings and I stomp off to class, anger pulsing through my veins and the taste of hatred in my mouth.