Playin' Hard (Original version)

Twenty

"Because—"

"Hey." She was awake and in the room.

I thumbed a finger over my shoulder. "I gotta take her home." I chanced a look at Cree, finding her appearing normal. She was wearing her outfit from the party and her hair was a little messy from her sleep, but she appeared all together, except there was something else.

Immediately I looked away, needing to run more than anything. There was even something different about her.

Chris was oblivious as he stood from the chair and looked over at Cree. "Someone had a good time last night. I saw you dancing all on Trey."

"You know how Trey likes to get down." Cree came more into the room until she was standing beside me. "I gotta admit, I'm upset he didn't cop a feel though."

I looked at Cree and she smiled to me, as if nothing had changed. "You guys were dancing close enough."

"Still, it felt weird without it."

"So you remember last night?" Chris asked. "I thought you'd pretend to forget."

Cree looked down at the carpet for a moment. "How could I forget? I wasn't that tipsy, Chris. Don't think I also didn't forget the lack of pigs you promised."

Chris frowned. "I tried, though."

I was over reliving the party.

"You hungry?" I asked.

Cree shook her head. "Nah, my dad's cooking a huge breakfast. He acts like I'm going to go down there and forget how to eat or something."

"You're leaving tomorrow." I said it more to myself than to her. As if to really see the bigger picture.

Cree smiled as if I were being silly. "Yeah, I am."

"Well then we gotta get you home. Mr. Jacobs probably wants to spend as much time with you as possible." I headed past her to leave to locate my keys. I turned and faced Chris. "On second thought, I'll get the coffee and doughnuts, you straighten up."

"Where's your housekeeper, bro?" Chris groaned as he stalked off from the room.

Cree shook her head. "You guys are spoiled."

I felt at a loss for words, so I said nothing.

Even in my car I opted for an awkward silence. Thank God for the radio.

"You're not hungover, are you?" Cree asked as she examined me.

I shook my head. "I didn't drink last night."

"Oh." Cree kept quiet then.

I took the quickest route to her house as possible. I needed space. I needed to run. I needed to talk to Darnel. My head was all jumbled, filled with thoughts that wouldn't stop.

Cree didn't say anything when I pulled in front of her house. Instead she sat there for a moment, sighing and moving some of her hair out of her face.

She turned to me, giving me a lopsided smile. "Well, I guess I'll see you in three months?"

Unable to resist, I reached out and smoothed out her hair to straighten up her appearance. I focused on her hair rather than her face. I couldn't even look her in the eyes.

"Yeah, I'll see you in three months," I said.

Cree unbuckled her seat belt and opened her door. She froze for a second, as if contemplating something before leaning over and giving me a hug.

"Goodbye, Dre." Her voice was soft and as she pulled back and looked at me one last time I inwardly winced at the sight of her. The wind was blowing in her hair and the sun was shining down, nearly casting a crown on her head. I swallowed, having no words to say back.

As Cree got out of the car I could tell the smile and the wave she gave me were forced.

I watched her as she headed up her front walk, her stride as graceful as ever. She never looked back once she made it to the front porch. She merely unlocked the front door and disappeared inside.

I sat back, staring at the vacant front porch, consumed with my thoughts.

Funny thing about epiphanies, they could really fuck up your whole afternoon.

No, Cree wasn't a bad bitch at all, but something deeper and more real. A cold bitch, the illest bitch alive, a woman, a lady, something even better than all that, a friend, a companion, a partner, a rider, a supporter, the real thing, and I—

Let her go.    

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"Illest Bitch" – Wale