Finding You

Chapter ~~12

            “It is the morning” he pointed out.

            “Touché” I said into my pillow. “Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

            “Demons do not need as much sleep. A few hours will sustain us for a week.”

            “So what do you do at night?”

            “Mostly I think. Sometimes I read, or I might take a walk. Whatever tickles my fancy at the moment.” I laughed when he said ‘tickles my fancy’. “What is so funny?” he asked curious.

            “Oh nothing” I giggled.

            Claude never did tell me the idea he had. He talked and eventually I fell asleep. I woke up the next morning and Claude wasn’t there. The next night he woke me up again at three o’clock in the morning. This time for not so noble of a cause. When I asked him why he woke me up he responded by saying he felt like it. He began to make a habit of coming to my bedroom at three in the morning. He would wake me at three and we would talk until I fell back to sleep.

            Nothing sexual ever happened between us. I mean we would kiss a couple times but it never went anywhere. It seemed like all the sexual chemistry was gone from our relationship. Even in the day we would only kiss a couple times and I never felt anything from it. When we first started dating kissing Claude was like setting off fireworks inside me. Now there was nothing. I don’t know what happened between me and Claude.

            I tested it one night. I went to bed in only my bra and panties. Claude came that night and woke me. He was sitting on the blankets. I told him to come under them, and he did willingly. I told him I had a surprise for him and to close his eyes. He did, and very slowly I climbed on top of him and straddled him. I threw off the blanket and told him to open his eyes. His eyes went up and down my body, and I felt a little self-conscious but I stayed still. A smile came to his lips.

            “What is the occasion for such a surprise?” he asked with a smile.

            I didn’t say anything and leaned down and kissed him. I would lose my nerve if I didn’t move on. Claude’s hands rested on my hips. My hands were busy trying to get his shirt off. The kiss went on and I didn’t feel a thing. It felt good but not like it used to. Kissing Claude used to feel dangerous. Like we could lose control of ourselves at any moment. Claude pushed me away.

            “Navia do you want to do this?” his eyes were excited, but under control. I know Claude is feeling it too. His eyes used to be so warm after we made out and now there is just a dull light coming from them. What has changed?

            “No sorry” I said defeated. I slid off of him and lay down. Claude pulled the blanket back up and covered me. He looked into my eyes and I think he saw that something was bothering me but he never asked. Probably because he knows what I’m thinking. We sat in silence just looking at each other.

            Since that night Claude and I seemed to grow apart. We talked all the time but about superficial things. I was thinking about it one day in combat class and suddenly I got angry. I was thinking about all the things going wrong and suddenly I was furious. We were practicing how to use a sword. We were practicing with partners and I took my aggression out on my partner.

            My partner was a tall guy named James. Suddenly things got serious for me and I really began to fight him. We had caught the attention of our classmates that were waiting for swords. They stood around our mat and watched. James was a good sword fighter but in an instant I saw a weak spot in his defense and I took it. I wasn’t sure what I did but it ended with his sword being thrust into the ceiling, and James defenseless. People clapped at my victory but I didn’t feel much better.