Ambivalence [p.h.] - EDITING

chapter 21 || stage three

"Tris!" I call. I notice the petite blonde wander timidly into the hall. She looks battered up. I rush out of my seat to meet her as she walks in. "Are you alright?" I whisper. Tris just nods.

"Good move not sleeping in the dorm again. But... where'd you go?"

"Four let me sleep at his place." I wiggle my eyebrows as Tris scoffs lightly, with a smile on her face.

"That's his sweater, I assume?" I say, pointing at the cozy-looking black material swarming her torso (and half of her legs too). Tris just looks away, the pinkish hue flowering on her cheeks in slight embarrassment. "Good luck with Four," I laugh. "Stay safe."

As I begin to make my way back to my original table, I pass by the one I sat at not even a week ago. Just as I start to tear my eyes away, my gaze locks in on a certain pair of green eyes. I can see a glimmer of hope flash through as Peter notices me, and I hesitate. I haven't sat with him in the longest time because I thought he wasn't the person I'd come to know. But after that confusing yet touching, almost, conversation late last night, I'm getting even more mixed feelings. I watch him as he watches me. I shake my head, and against my better judgement walk towards him.

"Hi," I say unsurely, as though I was testing the waters.

"Hey," Peter replies. He scoots over a little bit to give me room. I take it with a brief nod and sit next to him. Silence drowns the space around us as Molly shovels breakfast foods into her mouth. I wait for him to start.

"Listen–"

"Transfers," Four interrupts. He stands in between the tables and grazes around to each of our faces. He stops at me and shoots a weird look. It must be the Peter thing. I send him a weak smile and discreetly shrug. Four rolls his eyes and talks again. "We're doing something different today. Follow me."

• • •

Four leads us all out of the dining hall towards a corridor I have yet to explore. I maintain my pace next to Peter towards the back of the group so that Four is out of earshot. Especially after last night, I don't think he'd approve of anything Peter related. Except killing him, beating him up, or throwing him out of Dauntless. But other than that, I rest my case. "So..." I start. "I thought about what you said last night, and I think it's important that we talk about this." I'm hesitant to continue until Peter nods his head again in agreement. "Okay." I take a deep breath. "You were one of the first friends I made here, and that by itself is something important. My other original friends have either betrayed me, are factionless, or don't talk to me. I don't want to lose you either." I look at Peter to see his reaction to this. He nods, eager to listen to what else I have to say.

"The last few days have been terrible, for me and probably for you too, and if I'm going to allow you to stay in my life, you can't push people over the chasm railing. Okay?" I articulate in a hushed voice.

"Okay," Peter agrees. "Jax, I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too. I should have been there for you. Maybe then none of this would have happened. Let's forget about it." Peter nods and lets out a breath of relief. We climb higher than I've ever been before. I look behind Peter and I to see Drew struggling to keep up with his bruised and broken self. Good. He deserves it. Four turns and walks backwards a bit, even though the path behind him is narrow and without a railing.

"Pick up the pace, Drew!" Four calls. I snort and don't bother looking back at the red-head. I look up to see a glass ceiling; it gets bigger and bigger as we climb up until we reach the very top. We walk across the glass to a cylindrical building with glass walls amongst the half-collapsed building nearby. Dauntless members litter the floor in crowds, and I survey the area while I can as Four leads us through another door. Inside this new room is an empty space with graffitied walls and exposed pipes. It would seem like the kind of place to me grimy and disgusting, but it was fairly sterile as far as I could tell.