When Rayne Falls (Work in Progress)

When Rayne Falls- Chapter Nineteen

I hadn't heard from Rayne all day. It was now Saturday evening and I was on my second glass of whiskey. I felt like I was going through a divorce or something. I craved to have him here, on my lap, playing with my hair. I wanted him to kiss me and play wrestle with me and tell me he loved me. The only time I heard it from him was when he left me yesterday. And I didn't want that to be the only memory of him saying it.

I had picked my phone up countless times to see if he'd texted me, or to have an internal argument about calling him. But he didn't deserve me to beg for him. He chose, and he hadn't bothered to check in with me at all. He was probably riding Cody's dick into the sunset. And all of this because I cared about his emotions before anything else. Because I wanted to be decent and care about more than just physical attraction.

I loved him. But right now I also couldn't stand the thought of him.

This to me, was almost like the Demetri situation all over again. He wasn't straight-forward with me, and he still had feelings for someone else but wanted me there through it. And this time, I couldn't handle being second place. I needed to be first. I needed to know that I was the one and only person he wanted. Everything I knew about us was being brought into question in my own mind.

What were we really these past couple of months? Were we in a relationship or was it one-sided?

My life changed when I realized I loved Rayne. And now it was changing again while I tried to figure out if he even cared.

Demetri's POV

I went home after dropping Rayne off that morning, and my mind was spinning. I showered and got settled in front of my television, trying to distract myself from everything.

My feelings for him were resurfacing; I had tried to bury them and I had done a pretty good job of seeing him as a friend, but now I didn't know what was going on. It was almost like he and I mutually agreed to have feelings for each other despite everything going on.

I felt pain and anxiety whenever I thought about Jace. He was probably sitting at home, frustrated and emotional. And here I was, excited that there was a possibility of Rayne still caring for me. I was a horrible, horrible friend.

But it all made me think back to a few months ago. The undeniable connection he and I shared. The countless days we spent in his room together. I taught him some of the simpler sign language, and I was the first to know about his self-harm. I knew about Cody before anyone else. I was there for him. I was his first friend. And he cared about me. When he kissed me, I kissed him back. And then when I finally came to terms with having feelings for him, he had already started dating Jace. This was a fucked-up cycle.

I never thought I would be at the center of drama. I was always quiet Demetri, who was supposed to marry Shelby and have babies and live the most normal, mundane life possible. Now I was in the middle of possibly the most tense romance/fight my friend group had ever had to be in.

I pulled my phone out and texted Rayne.

What're you going to do about Cody? I needed to know if this would continue being a square of people, or if we could at least bring it down to him, myself, and Jace. Four was too complicated.

He's going back home. Tonight. Can you drive him to the airport? He asked. I felt a sudden surge of relief go through me. Cody was going home. Things could work themselves out after that.

Send me the time. I replied.

                    *    *    *

That evening, Rayne, Cody, and I were on our way to the airport. Cody seemed like he was in an understandably icy mood, but overall he didn't say much on the ride.