Trouble..(Evan peters/Editing)

I Always feel (16)

EVANS POV 

Maybe i overreacted. I could barely hear what she said, But i heard her , i hate myself for making you feel this way and i hate that i cant do anything about it. and i love... thats all i heard before i tried to block it out. Did she even mention me, at all? When i saw her run after me screaming i wanted to give in, i wanted to crash my lips into hers for caring for me, but i couldnt. I told her to stay away from him , she promised that she would never see him and yet there she was, there he was. I didnt get any sleep last night. I was still thinking about if she ever cheated on me with him. It goes to show that she should know that she is what my dreams are made of, but i cant fall alseep i stayed in my bed, awake at night knowing that she isnt here with me.

She makes me weak and i always felt the need to be with her, next to her.  Having a broken heart is like having broken ribs on the outside you look fine, but every breath hurts without her. Ironic, i was fairly familiar in that type of situation. My ribs did heal, when she took care of me.She healed me.She always said to take my pills when i didnt want to and then i knew she cared.  That night i....left... I ignored mark telling me that it was ok and i deserved better. I had to calm my self from almost punching him for saying that, so i had to stay silent. I am pulled out of my thoughts when I hear banging on the door. I turned on my other side and i cover my face with my pillow.

I get the smell of it and i throw it across the room. It smelt like her. Alyssa. After a couple of moments i hear banging again and i get up. I open the door to see mark and drew. I walk away from the door and they walk in and close the door behind them. "are you going to classes?" mark asked and i shrug. "come on you-" "i cant go to my fucking classes! she is there!...she is there." I interrupt. Drew walks toward me and pats my back. "evan its just one class." i shake my head. "i'll go tomorrow." i dont even bother to look into his eyes without seeing the judgment in them. "fine! i wont go then." mark says eliminating the silence. "yup. you need help, and we are going to help."

i quickly look at them. "i dont need any help." i snap and they laugh. "yea you do, come on lets do something." i take a minute before i walk into my bedroom to change. I come back and mark gestures toward the door. "lets roll." i roll my eyes and i follow them  out of this black hole you call my apartment. 

ALYSSAS POV 

 "I know right!" me and zoey have been talking about the uncle charlie from STOKER for an hour. I shake my head as she continues. " i mean i fell asleep, like maybe in the middle of the movie but DAMN!" she says loudly and i laugh.

On the outside i try to keep the a fake composure, that i dont have a care in the world, but on the inside every organ is aching and i am dying inside. I cried for hours in the parking lot and harry tried to cheer me up but it didnt help. I kept pushing him away and i   punched his chest a couple of times letting out my anger but he never went away. He stayed there , watched me cry and took the pain. I look at my knuckles and they are red, not bleeding but red. When i stopped, harry offered to take me back to my dorm before he went to his and all i said was "go to hell styles." i didnt even say his name once i kept calling him styles or prick. I know i shouldnt have because it wasnt his fault. It was my mistake and i needed to pay for it. But if i see harr-

"hello are you listening?" i shook my head from the thoughts and looked at her."huh? sorry what did you say?" she sighs "i SAID if you wanted to finish the chick-flick marathon?" i nodded "yea that would be great i never watched twight breaking dawn. " Her eyes get big."its amazing! well any way i got to go. See ya!" she yells as she runs the opposite direction. I have a couple of minutes til' i need to be in class so i take my time. I'm surprised that she was still asleep when i came back. I remember that i turned the tv off and climbed into bed and held the pillow that evan was sleeping on,  close to my chest, so i could smell the sent of him. That night i cried myself to sleep in silence, not waking zoey. I was hoping that evan was there but i am sadly mistaken.