Secrets Hidden In The Dark

Chapter 27 (* Hello... Again. Friend of a Friend. *)

6 Months Later

I can't believe it..today is the day. I spent many hours of the day and many days of the months preparing for this one day to be perfect. 

My breath was picking up every time I thought about it. My heart sped faster with every passing hour. The hours turned into minutes and minutes turned to seconds. It was just a matter of seconds away! I paced in the small empty dressing room. I sighed trying to get confidence but with every exhale, my confidence would go away with it. I had millions of questions in my head: Am I doing the right thing by begin here today?! Am I really ready for this, I mean i have done it before but that was different, I'm sober now. I felt my stomach turn with anxiousness and full of nerves. I mentally slapped my self and sat looking at the door for my signal. Not being able to stay still, I stand up again and pace. I look in the mirror at my reflection. I look okay, with everything in place.  

'There's still time to back out'  said a small voice in my head. I shook the thought out of my head and get mad at myself for even thinking about that. We had both agreed to this. And I'm ready for this next step with him. For some reason, Jace kept popping into my head. My heart ached at the thought of him and how this should have been us....But it isn't .  

I could feel the tears building up in my eyes caused by remembering Jace and being nervous but willed myself not to because my make up would smear. I look out the window and see the people arriving. I wanted it to be small but, the more the people came, the less confident I felt and believe me... People just kept coming and coming. A knock on the door made my stomach drop.

That was my cue.

I swallowed my fear back , made my way towards the door and opened it. I walked down the unfamiliar church stairs and see my dad waiting at the bottom of the stairs. I try to put a smile on but it kept falling as I descended.

My dad stuck his hand out for me to take, at the perfect time because I felt like I was going to faint of nervousness. Even though my dad was hardly around because of work, when he was around he was a great father.  

His same blue eyes as mine sparkled from tears forming.

" Daddy. I'm nervous." I whispered waiting for the music to begin for us to start walking down the aisle. He leaned in close to me and gave me kiss on the cheek.

"Don't be sweetie, It's the start of you long lasting life.Dylan is a great man, you picked him well." he said..

I was about to say something when the music started and my stomach dropped once again. I looked at my dad for reassurance and he gave my hand a little squeeze. The wooden doors opened and it reveals many pairs of eyes on me, which didn't help this black whole inside of me that seemed to want to devour me.

   We began walking down the long aisle. My legs shaking with anticipation as the aisle seemed everlasting now than I remembered it at the rehearsal dinner last night.

I tried to keep my focus on something that wouldn't make me want to run away so I looked straight forward. He always made me feel better. Since Jace had left, no one seemed to understand better than him. Everything about him made anything better. I blocked out all the stares and just focused on my husband-to-be. He was a great listener, a great talker, and most of all a great friend. He's my Dylan. That brought back some of my reassurance.