Silence IV [m.yg]

Thirty Three

Yoongi looked at the wall to his right, staring at his reflection in the mirror, slowly zoning out as the doctors' voices slowly faded, letting him drown, drown like the day he put his lovers, the piano and her, on fire. Although they were on fire, he still felt as if he was drowning.

This is it.

This is my destiny.

Yoongi was no longer abel to hear any of the voices that echoed in the room.

He finally drowned, whether it was happiness, emptiness or sadness that he fell into, he still drowned.

Maybe, just maybe, someone, someday, will walk into his life and pull him out, allowing him to breathe again.

They pointed fingers at him and screamed at one another, but all he did was stare what so intently at the damaged man that stared right back at him with teary eyes.

Is this what your world was like?

Was it always this silent?

Yoongi weakly smiled at his reflection before lightly trembling, letting out a weak sob.

What if Taehyung had his own reasons?

I wonder if he felt what I'm feeling now.

Was he drowning in absolute nothingness?

I believe he was and I also believe that Jimin was the only one that was burning on the inside and drowning himself was his way of putting the fire out.

We may be drowning in absolute nothingness, but Jimin, well, he drowned in a world of eternal nothingness.

Did I try to put myself on fire, because I felt like I was drowning?

Was I trying to save myself from the silent sensation that built up inside of me throughout the years?

Yoongi's vision blurred as he started to zone out even more, tears slipping sideways as he was being embraced by the silence of the world.

This is it, right?

Your dad got what he said he was aiming for.

I tried to prove my sanity, but I failed.

I failed because you can't prove your own sanity unless you really are a sane person.

I remember how you always tried to comfort me by telling me 'you're completely okay', but what if you were unaware of my insanity, because you, yourself, were just as insane?

I wish they could put a piano in this room and give me a lighter, because I'm still drowning.

Jackson got fired which means no one will ever treat me nicely and I will never be able to talk to Jungkook again.

My group of friends isn't the only thing falling apart, but so is the world.

By damaging ourselves and the ones around us, we end up in ruins.

We complain about how messed up the world is when we're the ones that messed it up in the first place.

Yoongi turned his head and stared at the ceiling.

I wonder if I'll be spending the rest of my life surrounded by this silence.

God, if you're there, then please take care of my friends, for I'm incapable of doing anything with these restraints.

I know I've never been a saint and maybe that's why I'm in this room, maybe you're torturing me, but if you really do listen to people's prayers, then listen to mine and just take good care of my friends.

Yoongi closed his eyes, inhaling.

What if I burned myself because I was preparing myself for hell?

I never believed in god nor have I ever believed in heaven and hell, but what if a very small part of me was helping me prepare myself for not eternal nothingness, but eternal burning in the pits of hell.

What if I survived so I could right my wrongs?

How am I supposed to right my

wrongs in this

room?

The End.