The Unholy Bible

Grocery Shopping- the Reekquel

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"TRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK! HELP!" I yelled as I ran down the hallway, looking for them. "GOD SENT ME A SENTIENT LETTER!"
The letter was perched on my shoulder, nagging me to choose an option. I shrieked as it attempted to pull on my hair. Trick grabbed it out of my hands and pressed their thumb onto the paper.
A speck of green paint hit my cheek
"FUCK WHERE ARE THE WORDS GOING????" Trick shrieked in alarm as the green and red paint faded away to reveal a set of words. I leaned over their shoulder to read.
Ah. So that's a yes, then?
Good. Meet me today at the bridge back at home. If you're worried, wear a hoodie. You know where I'm talking about. If you don't, ask Graell. They know exactly where I'm talking about.
No, it's not the actual place. It's in the mirror realm. Graell can make you a portal and escort you to the spot. I heard you grocery shop, maybe you could make a couple stops?
I eagerly await making your acquaintance.
Yours,
GOD.
"The fuck does this bitch want from me?!? I can't make a portal for that long, you'll be stuck in that hell."
"What is the mirror realm?" I asked, confused.
"Well, all of us deities have the ability to completely replicate a place and time, minus the people, and that's a place where we can go to relax, hide or hang out. Grace's is the entire empty city of Watertown back in the 1950's. I have two places. They sort of just... melt into each other," Trick explained. "According to Grace, there are 5 currently in existence, including mine, hers and Hawky's. I don't know who owns the other two, but I think Grace knows who one of them is."
Huh. "What's yours?"
"That's for another day. Come on, let's go grocery shopping."

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"300 bucks."

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I tried not to look anyone in the eyes as I strolled down the aisles looking for poptarts. I winced whenever I saw a MISSING poster near an aisle.
The photos looked so... different.
Younger.

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"That will be $150. Do you have a rewards card today, sir?"

I sighed. "No. Can you take into account that I don't have one?"
The guy looked up. "Sure," he said uneasily. "Can I have a name?"
"Yeezus."

"Last name, sir?" the guy asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Just Yeezus."
"Are you sure that you don-"
"Just Yeezus, I said."

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"Alright, this is the portal," Trick muttered, squeezing my shoulder. "You don't come back in an hour, I'll invade."

"Got it," I said, chuckling nervously. I stepped through and gasped.
The sky, the ground, no, EVERYTHING was black and white except for me and God. We were standing on the bridge near the church on Main Street. God was waiting on the other side. I hesitantly walked over and stood next to Grace.

She nodded and opened a portal. I stepped through, eager to leave. The silence was giving me the creeps.

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We were in a forest now. Despite hunting often back home, I couldn't recognize this forest. Were we in Northern Canada? There wasn't any road or signs for miles. The only thing that signified any people living here was a small dirt trail that we were following.

There was light ahead of us.

I looked, and there was a sheet of glowing, clear gold (water?) something that blocked everything in front of us. It moved like liquid or honey, but seemed to be made of light.
"You have to close your eyes now," Grace said, not unkindly. "You should be able to go through if your eyes are closed and you haven't been touched by a demon."