GAY AS A MEATBALL (Scomiche)

A Truthy Dare

"Do you have any secret talents?" I asked him. "We all know you're the most talented guy in the world, but what are you hiding from us?"

"Gosh, Mitch, thanks. I'm not that talented. Umm... let's see. I'm good at math! I'm actually thinking about adding a math minor. Or maybe a Chinese minor. Or maybe both."

"Okay A, you speak Chinese? And B, way to make that question super boring. I want a better secret talent," Avi complained. "How have I been living with you for almost two weeks and not know you spoke Chinese, though?"

"It didn't come up, man. You never tried speaking to me in Mandarin," Kevin retorted. "Okay, what else? Oh, I can beatbox! I'm pretty decent at beatboxing anyway."

"Oh my god! That's so cool, show us!" Scott demanded. "I keep trying to learn but I feel like I'm never making progress."

Kevin rolled his eyes and started a slow, basic beat, but then seemed to gain confidence and totally went off. We all sat in complete silence, with our jaws hanging slack, staring at Kevin until he saw our shocked expressions and faded out, making a sheepish face.

After a few seconds of silent awe, Kirstie spoke up. "Kev, you are hands down the best beatboxer I've ever heard in real life. That was wicked. Why don't you, like... Do that professionally?"

Kevin burst out laughing. "Thanks, Kit, but it's really not all that. Besides, I love the cello and could never quit playing it. Although sometimes I do add sick beats to Bach preludes, you know... For fun."

Everyone laughed, except Scott, who was still just staring at Kevin like he was the second coming of Jesus. "Kev, you gotta do our a capella project with us. Can you imagine how fucking amazing that would be? We would absolutely kill every other group. We'd have our own bass and percussion, right here," he said, gesturing to Avi and Kevin. "And why the hell didn't you mention this before, when we were practicing? It's gotta happen, you have to join us."

"Pleeeease!" Kirstie and I added, although Kevin already looked on board.

"Okay! Yeah, I'm in. I didn't know you wanted a beatboxer... Sorry! I'd suggest we practice now, but it's after quiet hours, and I don't feel like getting in trouble for literally doing our homework."

Avi chuckled. "I second that. I'd like a dare, then."

We continued to play for a bit, and I felt like I got to know my new friends much better. Scott dared Avi to trim his beard into a point, so he'd look like an elf. He did it, but told us he would just trim it all to be back to normal after we left. Kevin dared Kirstie to ask Jeremy out, a boy from her musical theater class that she'd been talking to, as she was obviously waiting for him to do it first, and Kevin told her that was lame. She spent approximately ten years crafting a text to him, and then he responded in seconds saying he'd love to go out with her. She was ecstatic, and I was happy for her, but she was in an irritatingly cocky mood from then on out.

This cocky mood resulted in her insisting that since she was my best friend, she could forgo giving me a choice, and instead could just give me "a truthy dare".

"Mitch, I dare you to kiss the most attractive one of us here. You gotta be truthful about who that is, I'm dying to know."

"Kirst! That's not fair to anyone. You know you're gorgeous, but I'm obviously not into your... type. And the rest of you boys are straight, so no one wants me kissing them. I'll take a new dare, please and thank you."

"Oh come on! Okay, it can be a kiss on the cheek. No one could be opposed to that, right?" She looked around at the guys expectantly. Avi shrugged, laughing a little, but I could practically smell Kevin's discomfort, and Scott was making direct eye contact with his knees like they were speaking to him. Okay then.

I would obviously choose Scott if I were "being truthful about it," but I knew how uncomfortable he'd be if he knew how attractive I found him, and he still had to sleep in the same room as me every night. I couldn't put him through that. Besides, Avi was plenty cute, and seemed the least uncomfortable with these shenanigans.

I made a big show of looking everyone up and down, once they'd all started watching me, and then dramatically leaned in and kissed Avi on the cheek. He laughed heartily, gave a "thanks, Mitchie," and kissed my cheek, too. Kirstie awwed and Kevin gave a relieved chuckle, but when I snuck a glance over at Scott as I was sitting back down, I saw him glaring at me with slightly rosy cheeks. When he saw me looking, however, he quickly shifted his gaze back down to his knees.

Ouch. Was he really that uncomfortable with homosexuality? That a silly little platonic cheek-kiss would set him off? I couldn't be more glad I'd gone with my instincts to not be honest and kiss him instead, he probably would have fucking stormed off.

For the rest of the game, all of Scott's excitement about Kevin's beatboxing seemed to be drained from him completely. He was even withdrawn when Avi dared him to blow up a few condoms like lubey balloons and set them free from the window into the breeze. The rest of us were totally losing it, but Scott seemed to be too wrapped up in his head to even let a chuckle loose.

Soon, the game came to a natural end and we parted ways after making plans to get lunch together the next day and then practice Radioactive afterwards. Scott and I walked through the bathroom back into our room, and I got ready for bed as quickly as I could, and hopped in without saying a single word. I wasn't even very mad at him, but his reactions were irritating, and if he was going to be sullen...well, two could play that game.