I Think I've Had Enough

Chapter 73: We'll Watch Our Worries Rise Up Smoke into the Starlight

The weeks after Patrick's confession were filled with a strangely calming form of denial. Although their bubble was incredibly naive it was just enough to find comfort in each other, in the past.

And even just for a moment they hovered in this place perfectly between fantasy and reality. Unwilling to face either but breathing in every moment that they could.

The secret that he had finally admitted to both himself and Ellen, had set Patrick free. So free that she realized he had forgiven her. Something that she never thought he would be able to do. It was an uncomplicated truth in the midst of their chaos, he wanted her in his life. He had always wanted her in his life.

She watched as he returned fully to the Patrick she had fallen in love with. A thought that was filled with fear and excitement.

Their daughter was starting to blossom. She had gained a best friend in Stella and a world of comfort in their new living situation. Emilee even seemed to gleam at the new found ease of Patrick and Ellen's relationship.

This morning was what most of their days had recently looked like. Ellen tied her hair back, threw on a white t-shirt and a pair of jeans. She then eagerly met Patrick in the kitchen. He had finished filling her coffee mug and passed it to her just as she entered. A smile spread across her face, "You're the best."

Patrick took his own coffee, touching the small of Ellen's back as he padded from the kitchen, "Girls," he called to Emilee and Stella. "Almost ready?"

"Yes," they replied in unison. Emilee started to walk slowly out of the bedroom, Stella close behind her trying to finish braiding Emilee's hair. "There," Stella said with a quick pat, "Finished."

"Well don't you two look beautiful," Patrick smiled his McDreamy charm.

Stella returned the smile. In this short time of living together, Stella had grown quite fond of Patrick. He was everything Chris hadn't been. Present, kind, oddly committed to her mother. Something Stella didn't quite understand but still appreciated.

Ellen held the door as her two daughter skipped to the car. "Hey Dempsey," she shouted into the house, "Were going to be late!"

Patrick came to the door with a binder in his hand. "I think Stella forgot this." He smiled and handed it to Ellen. He gestured her away from the door and held it for her, "Go ahead."

The lack of turmoil between them had made way for a world of emotions Ellen wasn't sure she was ready for. But ready or not they were trickling in during moments like this. She reached Patrick's car door and turned to look at him. They had never been able to share a life together, not the making coffee and taking the kids to school kind of life. It was oddly captivating.

Patrick flipped on the radio as he pulled out of the driveway, "Seat belts?"

The commute to school was a short one but Ellen couldn't help but fall into a state of security. That was something she hadn't felt much in her life. Ellen flipped through the script, "How many scenes do we have today?'

"I don't think very many," Patrick answered, "Three maybe."

"Good," she nodded and reached for her coffee without looking. Patrick reached at the same moment. Their hands bumped in the middle. His hand settled on hers for a moment. She turned to look at him, feeling like her world had been set on fire. His eyes waivered over hers for a moment. The car behind them honked, calling attention to the front.

Stella's eyes widened a little as she watched their hands separate. Feeling like there may have been something she had missed, "Are you guys together together?" she spoke with a little confusion.

"What," Ellen said taken aback, "No," She shook her head, "We're just friends honey."

As Patrick pulled to a stop in front of their school he turned to see Emilee's face. It was a face he was quite familiar with. The face he made when he knew something the world didn't. The face of success. He laughed at her lightly and got out of the car.

He opened the door for Stella, without warning she wrapped her arms around him. Emilee slid across the seat and followed suit. With a quick wave to their mother they continued on their way into school.

Ellen sat in silence contemplating what had just taken place. She recognized that it was only a matter of time until all of her feelings for him would come pouring in. She had thought this on a couple of instances over the last few months, but never as strongly as she did in this moment.

"Just friends," he said with a raise of an eyebrow as he returned to the driver's seat.

"Who are you again?" she played, "Have we met before?"

"You did just try to hold my hand," Patrick returned the playfulness.

"Uh," she huffed, "So much ego. I was reaching for my coffee."

"Sure," he nodded, "of course you were."

"I can't believe she asked that," Ellen took a serious note.

"Really," Patrick responded, "I'm surprised it took her this long. We are living together."

"In separate bedrooms," Ellen stated firmly. She took a moment to think about it, "Oh god," She spoke, "Is this confusing for her?"

"Isn't it confusing for all of us," Patrick laughed but Ellen didn't appreciate it. "Ellen," he spoke softly reaching for her hand. "She's fine. She will be fine."

Ellen nodded, "Now who's trying to hold hands?"

"I was reaching for my coffee," he smiled.