Invisible Pain

Chapter Eighteen

    Mmmm...huh? What's going on? Where am I? Karissa woke up hearing beeping noises and feels a little woozy from her fall. She opens her eyes very slowly and realizes where she is at. Oh shit I'm in the hospital! She sees her left hand hooked up with IV to the machine and feels her head tight as she's got white bandages wrapped around her head. She felt confused and discombobulated but knew she was in trouble when she saw her left arm and her thighs bandaged up from the cuts she has made.
    Then all of a sudden a nurse in a pink uniform walked into the room, looking at Karissa as if though she was relieved she was awake. "Hello there, how are you? Do you remember who you are?", "H-Hi, yes my name is Karissa Hanley." She replied to the nurse, "How bad is my head?", "You suffered a slight traumatic blow to the head but not enough I can tell that you remember your name. There is going to be a doctor coming to see you later on to ask you questions.", "Is it a...", "Karissa don't be scared, she's a good Psychiatrist. All she wants is to ask you about your cuts on your body.", "Am I going to be sent away to a crazy house?", "I don't think so my dear, all she wants to do is to talk to you. The cuts you had on your arms and thighs didn't look very good and we could see this wasn't your first attempt.".
    Karissa looks down at her legs in shame but felt the nurse putting her hand on Karissa's shoulder assuring her everything is going to be okay. "I sure hope you are right." She says to the nurse. "Is there a family member you would like to call to be with you at this time?", "Ugh, no I better not. My family is two hours away and I rather that they don't see me like this.", "Very well then, I will let you rest Karissa.". Karissa sleeps for a couple of hours knowing nobody is going to care that she is in the hospital...especially Trevor. Before she woke up, she dreamt that he had came into her room with flowers and was crying away apologizing over and over again and says he was wrong this time. She had a tear in her eye wishing that had came true.
    It wasn't long until a short, slightly chubby lady who believed to be in her mid-thirties with a dress shirt and a scarf around her neck, came into Karissa's room closing the door behind her. "Hello Karissa, my name is Dr. Yvonne Ryan." She says shaking Karissa's hand. Karissa looked at her feeling scared and unsure what to say to Dr. Ryan. "How are you feeling?" She asks her tilting her head to her right, "I-I'm feeling okay, just scared right now.", "Don't be scared my dear, you are in a good place. We are all professionals that want to help you get better.", "Am I going to be sent to a crazy house?", "I highly doubt that Karissa, I don't always send my clients there, what I do recommend is for you to talk to someone instead. I have a good feeling that's what you need since I can tell by those bandages on your arm and thighs, you do need to express your feelings and let all that anger out in a healthy way.". Karissa's fear went down and soon became calm and relaxed.
    "How long am I going to be in the hospital for? I need to go back to work.", "I understand that Karissa, we all do but your employer is giving you sick days and you will be in the hospital for a few days until I feel it is safe for you to go home.", "I hope he didn't fire me.", "Oh dear, you have nothing to worry about. Your employer understands the situation and knows you are a good employee. Everyone cares about you Karissa.", "Sometimes, I don't feel that's not the case.", "This is where I come in, I want to help out a young, beautiful woman like yourself.", "Trust me, I'm not beautiful Dr. Ryan. You should see how bad I hurt myself.", "Scars and cuts are different, all they are signs of struggle and that you are a strong person going through a hard time.". Karissa had never realized that before as she always sees towards more of a negative way. "Is there a family member you would like to be with you?", "No thank you Doctor, I prefer none of them are here.", "Oh? Can you tell me why is that?", "It's just that none of them know any of my struggles, I've hidden from everyone except...", "Oh, we have a lot of time to talk about it my dear, unfortunately I do have other meetings to attend to but I will talk to you soon." Dr. Ryan shook Karissa's hand once more and walked away opening her door.
Karissa lays there and decides to do the one thing she should of have done a long time ago so she wouldn't have been in the hospital bed. She saw her purse sitting on a chair beside her, she grabs her iPhone and instead of looking at messages which she knows there wouldn't be any, she shuts her phone off and stuffs it back in there and pushes the chair away from her.