Thank you guys for being so kind about me not posting everyday, I have been sick and stressed out about stuff. Anyway let's get on with the chapter
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{THERE WILL BE TWO PARTS}
We pulled up to the house just Josh and I. I took a deep breath and got out of the car when he was parked and the car was off. I walked over to the start of the sidewalk that led to the door and waited for Josh to come and open the door. He took out his keys with the one free hand he had which was his right his left hand had the hospital bag. He finally unlocked the door and walked in and dropped the bag on the table next to the door. I walked in behind him and grabbed his hand, I knew it was hard for him to be here and it was for me. Being in a place where the baby was in my stomach for 9 months, where it was made. I feel like a big piece of me is gone, Alex is gone he isn't here it doesn't feel right. I held him for 9 months and he was a healthy baby for those 9 months but right when I am in labor he isn't. I got out of my thoughts and let go of his hand and walked up to the nursery. I stopped right when I got in front of the door to enter it. I saw only a few things, some stuff animals that were on the wall, pictures, a rug and the last thing was the rocking chair. I got the courage to walk in, i took a step in and walked over to the rocking chair. I ran my fingers on the chair and took a seat. Right when I sat down tears ran out of my eyes, i couldn't stop them as much as I tried. I buried my head into my knees which was painful but I didn't care. I can't believe you are gone Alex, why you! I screamed inside my head. Tears just escaped my eyes like a river and they wouldn't stop. I couldn't see anything and felt a strong pair of hands pick me up and place them on there lap. "Josh?" I asked weakly still crying "Yes" I could hear in his voice that he was trying not to cry "We were suppose to be a happy family, we were suppose to be here with Alex.. why us?" I asked to him while I turned to face his face still in his lap. "I don't know" he said "My baby is gone" I threw my head into his chest and stared to cry "I won't be able to teach him sports or show him how to get girls.." Josh said letting out a slit chuckle, I looked up at him and saw him look into my eyes "You are very good at getting girls. I mean you got me" I said smiling a bit with tears still running down my face "I love you, and no matter what just happened I will love you forever." He said "I love you too" I got out of his lap and laid down on the floor next to him. He laid next to me and pulled me into his arms, we were both looking at then ceiling which was plain white. I all the sudden got an Idea "Josh" i asked turning to lay on my side. "What if we took lanterns and lit them and then let them go today the day he... he passed" I suggested "That would be an amazing idea he said facing me. He pushed a piece of my hair aside and kissed my cheek. "Shall we go find some?" He asked getting up. I nodded my
Head and followed him downstairs out the door. We were driving to the a Target near the house. We soon arrived and walked into the Target. "I will go get the lanterns can you grab a lighter and the things on the list?" Josh asked handing me a piece of paper with 3 things on it Detergent, Hand soap and Lighter. I looked at the list and went on my way to go look for everything. I grabbed the detergent and hand soap and lighter and made my way back. On my way I passed the baby clothes, I stopped and looked st the boys clothes. I saw a lady with her husband and her baby in her arms. That was suppose to be Josh and I.
We paid and drove home, the whole way was silent but a nice quiet. I kept thinking about that couple with there baby, I wish that was Josh and Alex and I, one happy little family. I bursted into tears thinking about that. "what's wrong?" Josh asked parking the car. "I miss him. I saw a couple with a baby... that was suppose to be us" I told him with my head in my hands "It will be one day." He told me "I love you" I told him "I love you too" he said
To be continued..
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I know this chapter isn't the best but it is a filler, I will post another chapter soon. There is a hurricane coming so I may have a lot of time to write chapters
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