Supernatural Preferences

Angst Preference: He Breaks Down

A/N: I kept this quite mild but please don't read if you are wasily triggered. I don't want any of you lovely and wonderful readers suffering unnecessarily.

Dean, Sam, Castiel & Gabriel:

I turned towards him, smiling. "Hey."

He sighed, looking exhausted. I noticed that his eyes were red and puffy, evidence that he had been crying all night. How did I know? Because I had been awake until the early hours of the morning listening to him. "Hey."

"Hungry?" I gestured to the plate of freshly made pancakes with a nod of my head.

He nodded and sat down on one of the kitchen chairs. I poured him a cup of coffee just the way he likes it. As I watched him eat, I stood there and thought that maybe we're going to be okay. Maybe he had recovered from his latest traumatic experience.

That's when he suddenly broke down infront of me. His pancakes were pushed aside and he was crying, a gesture I had never seen him indulge in before. 

His head rested in his hands. At that moment, I felt lost, I had no idea what to do. The feelings of dispair were so overwhelming, just watching him cry made my entire body hurt like one giant bruise.

 Then he reached out to me, like a child does when upset. I rushed to him immediately. As soon as his arms wrapped around my waist, I realised that I needed him more than he needed me. I needed him in my life to give me purpose, I know it may sound stupid but it's true. I love him, I love him so much.

"I'm sorry." he choked on his sobs. "I can't keep pretending everything's alright. I really messed up this time. I messed up really bad. People died because of me, (y/n). Innocent people who should be waking up this morning, eating pancakes with their family, not lying in the county morgue. And it's all my fault. I'm a monster, an absolute monster. I'm the one who hunters should track and purge the world of. Get away from me while you still can, (y/n). Run away and stay far away from me. Just stop loving me."

I knelt beside him and turned his head to look at me. Gently with the sleeve of my jumper, I wiped his tears away, I let my own escape and fall. "You," I take a deep breath in. "you aren't a monster. Yes things went wrong and yes, people got hurt but it wasn't your fault. And how could you possibly ask me to leave you? Without you around, how on earth do you expect me to go on through life? You have my heart- I gave it to you and I don't want it back. I promise to love you no matter what."