Spaces in between (Stockholm Syndrome: Extended chapters)

January 2017

~Archer~

"You were supposed to call me!"

"I'm here, aren't I?"

"I told you to call me when you touched down"

"I wanted to surprise you!"

"I hate surprises. And I thought we agreed you were going to listen to me for your safety's sake!"

"Don't. Don't do that!"

"Don't what? Don't care about your safety?"

"Don't use my safety to control me!"

Silence

Felix and I had been dating for two months. Above is a snippet of one of our arguments. It was two months after the Vasiliev brothers were killed along with Konstantin. I thought things were back to normal, but it only made Felix more paranoid. I had to call him whenever I went somewhere without him. I usually didn't mind but that time I had thought of doing something nice.

I had just returned home from Christmas break. Felix had "instructed me with love" to call him as soon as I arrived at the airport. He probably had plans to pick me up, but I thought I'd just surprise him and rock up at his apartment. Things didn't go so well.

He knew my flight number and he knew when I'd landed.

He'd been about to call me when I knocked on his door. I had the widest smile on my face. I was happy to see him after the break. I thought he'd be happy to see me too. He chose to be pissed off instead. My words didn't help.

"I don't mean you control me, it's just..." I started after my outburst.

"No, you said what you mean".

"Felix", I said softly.

He shrugged, just before his phone rang. He answered and spent a great deal of time on the phone. I waited for him to finish, only for him to tell me he had to go. He wouldn't let me explain.

For two days we didn't talk. He was still mad at me and I was mad at both him and myself. I'd said things I didn't mean only because he being paranoid was frustrating.

He did background checks on my friends and their friends. He had to know where I was at all times. I couldn't surprise him and I hated that. I wanted to be spontaneous, do something he didn't expect. He knew my schedule off by heart. He was really seconds from putting his little bugs on me. At times I suspected he did because he made comments like, "I can't listen to Stella sing" minutes after Stella had sung while with me. Maybe I was the paranoid one.

The two days without Felix were torture. I'd already spent time without him owing to the Christmas break so I missed him terribly. I called on day two and he didn't answer. He was obviously giving me the silent treatment.

On day 3 there was a knock on my bedroom door. I was still sharing the apartment with Alex. I hadn't heard a knock on the main door so I assumed it was him.

"Can't a person sleep in peace?!" I shouted.

"I'm glad you are, I'm not", a voice drawled outside the room. I knew instantly that it was Felix.