A Malec Alphabet

M- Midnight Movies

Midnight Movies (featuring Magnus's love of Rom-coms)

"Remind me again why you had to invite half my family, Clary, a couple of were-wolves and a vampire here to disrupt our friday night." Alec groaned as Jordan sat on HIS spot on the purple sofa.

Magnus rolled his eyes. "It's called socialising my dear, and frankly, you're going to have to deal with it." He gave his boyfriend a push towards the group.

"So, what are we actually going to do apart from eat?" Clary said, her mouth half-full of Jace's Mu Shu Pork.

Izzy sat up straight. "Truth or Dare!"

"NO." Everyone groaned.

Izzy pouted. "Why not?"

Maia raised an eyebrow. "Because that would be a cliché." She said.

"We could watch a film?" Simon suggested. Everyone seemed up for that, so Jace and Clary rustled though the DVDs that Magnus had.

"Do you only have Chick-flicks?" Jace groaned.

"They're called Rom-Coms," Magnus sniffed. "And they are not simply for women.

Clary pulled out a DVD at random. "Aww, The Notebook."

Magnus turned to Alec. "Hey, remember the last time we watched that and we-"

"No."

"Would you like me to remind you?"

"No."

Simon pulled a face. "I think we'll all sleep tonight if you keep that information to yourself Magnus."

Alec reddened slightly (Magnus did like how he blushed so easily) but said nothing. Eventually the group decided upon Lord Of The Rings.

"I thought you hated action films?" Simon whispered to Izzy.

"Two words." She replied. "Orlando Bloom. Oh, and Elijah Wood." The girls sighed. "No, Lord of the Rings is a good film"

The boys tried to look macho. Simon kinda failed that.

Clary didn't like how Jace and Alec talked in films.

"You can't do that! That physically isn't possible."

"You're a terrible fighter Aragon! You should have died when that dude hit you!"

"I'm sorry, but you can't keep fighting after being shot by three arrows, one in the heart as well."

"Who's that one?"

"He's the one who's the dad of the girl who likes the swordy guy."

"Oh him. He looks like a prune."

Clary pulled on Jace's hair. "Shut up. I can't concentrate on Orlando Bloom's gorgeous face." Jace pouted.

Maia gasped. "Don't you think Alec looks like Orlando Bloom but younger? Omg, give him long hair and he'd totally be Legolas."

The girls (and Magnus) turned on him.

"And he's an archer." Clary gasped. (It sounded like Gollum hissing to Alec who was backing away slowly.)

The girls formed a circle around him. "Magnus, we're going to need your help." Izzy pulled out a suitcase from her jacket. "It's makeover time."

As Alec screamed in agony, Simon and Jace pointed out yet more flaws. (They were on the Two Towers now).

"What?"

"Who's she?"

"Ugh, who'd want a beard?"

"That's impossible. And a waste of energy. Why would you back flip off a horse when you could just run him down?"

With a final puff of glitter, Alec's makeover was over. He actually did look a lot like Orlando Bloom, and the blonde wig that they'd forced him into didn't look too bad.

"GET. IT. OFF. ME." Alec growled.

Magnus pouted, but snapped his fingers and the outfit (wig and makeup sold separately) vanished. "It was fun while it lasted girls."

"Hey, where did Jordan and Maia go?" Clary noticed.

Alec stood, weak and wobbly. "I'll find them." He wobbled off, not wanting to see Orlando Bloom again.

As he strolled through the open bedroom door, he walked straight into Jordan. Jordan, being heavier and more muscular managed to knock Alec over, landing on top of him 'accidentally' brushing lips with the older Shadowhunter.

"AGGGHHH!" Jordan yelled, scrambling backwards.

"UGGGHHHHH!" Alec cried, backing away.

"MAGNUS IS HERE, NEVER FEAR! What happened?" Magnus appeared out of nowhere in a superhero costume, Chairman Meow floating at his shoulder wearing a miniature cape.

"Jordan kissed me." Alec groaned, curling into the fetal position.

Jordan raised his head from the floor to glare at Alec. "No, you kissed me."

"You're the one who fell over on top of me."

Magnus helped Alec up. "My dear, if you just cheated on me with that horrible were-wolf, please tell me now."

"I'd rather poke my eyes out with a fork. Frankly, I think I need a shower." Alec said seriously, casting another dirty look at Jordan who scowled.

"I am not horrible." Maia helped him up and raised an eyebrow. "I'm not! You should be honoured that you kissed me." He lifted his chin.

Alec turned, a furious look in his eyes. "I. Did. Not. Kiss. You." He lunged for Jordan, tackling the heavier boy to the floor. The two boys attempted to roll each other into walls.

"Oh my giddy aunt, a fight!" Magnus exclaimed.

Maia looked at him strangely. In fact, she had been looking at him strangely since she had accidentally seen him naked and painted like a tiger on Midsummer. (Chapter 2 for the peasants who can't remember). Magnus pushed that thought away.

Clary, Izzy, Jace and Simon ran into the hallway.

"A fight?" Simon asked, apparently oblivious to the boys rolling around on the floor shouting insults at each other.

Izzy swooned in fear for her brother.

Fight music started. Clary looked at Jace, who sighed and turned off the music on his phone. Alec had his hand against Jordan's mouth, pushing his face away.

"Jordy, did you just LICK Alec?" Maia asked, horrified.

"How is he not reacting to such an insult?" Clary gasped.

Magnus raised an eyebrow. "Oh, he's used to licking."

"I think I just threw up in my mouth." Simon gagged.

Jace was getting teary. "ALL I WANT IS TO FINISH THIS MOVIE, IT'S ONE IN THE MORNING FOR GOODNESS SAKES." He yawned, which made Izzy croon and chub his cheeks. (Pinch his cheeks, whatever. I say chub).

"Why don't you and Clary go back together?" She suggested, cackling. Then she whispered to Simon. "I ship those two almost as much as I ship Magnus and Alec."

-

Well. You can tell I'm VERY tired... I'm not sure what's going on. Lots of flashbacks. NOBODY gets a shoutout because NOBODY helped me find superpowers for Chairman Meow who now has to go without. I'll give you guys one more chance. FIRST person to comment a superpower for him wins.

Izzy's still shipping, Jace is a grumpy cow and the girls like Orlando Bloom (who doesn't?).

Oh yeah, disclaimer: I don't own Lord of the Rings. I wouldn't be writing this if I did. I'd be on a boat somewhere sunny... Ahhh someday...

Also, I wrote this before I knew what One Directions album was called. THIS IS NOT AN ALLUSION TO THAT! I don't like them, my sister told me about the album. But, you know, each to their own

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