damaged by your touch | [ joker x reader ]

AMBIVALENCE

You awoke with a start, your face contorting in pain as your stomach screamed for food. You whimpered, slipping out of the sheets and padding over to the door. The door opened easily, and you squinted your eyes against the harsh morning light seeping through the picture windows of the hallway. You really needed food, but you still couldn't find the damn kitchen.

You started walking down the halls, glancing around for half-open doors and such when a loud squeal caught your attention. You jumped, whipping around to meet Harley's excited eyes. She held you with a death grip around your shoulders, a twang of pain shooting through your arm as you felt scabs reopening. You forced a smile, murmuring a quick hello.

"I've missed you so much! J has been sooooo busy and I feel like it's been ages since I've seen ya- I've been so bored!"

It had been literally a day. Jesus Christ, woman. You smiled and nodded weakly, laughing lightly.

"Yeah, I bet you have." Your stomach growled loudly, and you couldn't help but clench your stomach and wince. God, this was why diets were such pains in the asses.

Harley frowned, gazing at your face,"Hey honey, you alright? Ya don't look so good. Do you want me to get you some water? Food?"

You nodded and smiled, your hand gripping the front of the white T-shirt you had been so graciously provided in your closet. "That would be lovely, thank you."

She beamed and tugged you along the halls, skipping,"Come on, I absolutely love the kitchen! It's got tons a' food and stuffs even though Puddin' rarely eats. His boys restock the fridge every so often, just so tha food don't get nasty."

She crinkled her nose,"Blegh! Rotten food is gross."

You smiled lightly, looking at the woman in front of you. You couldn't imagine that this childish person was ever a psychiatrist, she just seemed so carefree and happy and just pleasant to be around. You frowned as you realized it was probably all a front for the abuse that man - The Joker - puts her through.

"We're here-!" She beamed, tugging you in the massive kitchen filled with white marble countertops, black stainless steel appliances, and little splashes of green plants all around the counters. You smiled, lightly brushing the leaf of a plant. You didn't peg the Joker as a plant kinda guy.

"That little guy was from Pam." Harley interrupted your train of thought, a smile on her face,"You probably know her betta as Poison Ivy, but she's a close friend. Real sweet."

You smiled weakly and nodded, retracting your hand from the possibly dangerous plant, your gaze funneling straight to the fridge. You smiled, bouncing over to the fridge and opening the door. It was like heaven.

Light spilled out from the appliance, food neatly stocked on every shelf. You smiled, glancing over at Harley,"Can I have some of this stuff?"

She beamed and nodded, picking up an apple and taking a massive bite out of it,"Help yourself, sweetie. It's not like Puddin' ever eats any of it." She fumbles out in between chews. You smiled and nodded, glancing back at the fridge.

Your stomach protested loudly to the lack of food devouring, so you quickly pulled out what seemed to be leftover Mexican chips and dip. You closed the fridge with your elbow, placing the items on the bar table and slipping onto a stool before digging in. You sighed blissfully as you ate, the crunch of the chips so satisfying as your stomach began to shut up.

After devouring most of the leftovers, you glanced over at Harley, who was sitting there and staring at you with a smile. You flushed, covering your mouth.

"Oh my god, I probably look like a pig right now, don't I?"

She smiled, waving you off,"It's no problem. It's just nice havin someone here to talk to. It's different with Puddin's boys, they're always frisky and don't wanna talk much. I guess they're afraid he's gonna kill em." She giggled, but smiled softly as she placed a hand on yours,"I really hope you do stay. Even though J's been real stressed lately, you've definitely made things a little more fun for me. You treat me nicely."

She grinned and hopped up off the chair, tugging you off your stool as well,"Let's go do something! Maybe we could-"

"Ask me first? How about that?" A low voice cut in, and you couldn't help but shiver. You turned around to see The Joker -in his purple crocodile skin jacket over his dress suit- with an awful scowl upon his face. You swallowed, your food threatening to come back up. You could feel yourself shrinking back towards Harley, who you recognized was saying something, but everything faded to white noise.

His eyes bore into yours like searing hot irons, but no matter how long he stared, his eyes were still completely void of anything.

By now Harley was draping herself all over him, planting kisses on his cheeks with big smiles and lots of love. But no love came off of that man. He sucked it all in, hoarding it, and you could feel yourself becoming rooted to the spot. You blinked rapidly, trying to drag your gaze away. But you couldn't.

The man smirked, and suddenly all sound came back. You looked down at your feet, your arm rubbing your shoulder as you heard him clear his throat.

"Hey. Do me a favor and give me your neck."

You froze, your head whipping up to see his sly smile. You nodded hesitantly, walking closer to the man until that faint smell of gunpowder, cigarettes, and delicious cologne invaded your sinuses. His tongue swiped over his bottom lip, staring at you hungrily. His smile grew wide as his fingers traced along your throat.

You closed your eyes, swallowing as your mouth became dry. His breathing was close, and you could hear him chuckle slightly. His hand wrapped around your neck, giving it a quick and sudden squeeze before he released his grip. Your eyes flew open, staring wide at the man who was looking at you under lidded eyes.

"You're not wearing your collar, pet."

You froze, sputtering,"I'm sorry, I just-"

He snatched your jaw, crushing it with his grip as you whimpered out in pain. Searing hot pain flashed through the flesh of your cheek, your heart rate speeding as he leant down close to your ear. You could feel yourself shaking, your chin quivering as you held back tears.

His eyes were crazed and wide, his grin stretched and big,"Does my pet need to be punished, or will it put on its damn collar?"

You could feel the crescents of nails digging into your skin as you choked out a quick confirmation. He tore his hand away from your face, the stinging sensation growing as you whimpered and held your face.

He looked at you with disgust, a growl sounding from the back of his throat,"I hate when my things decide to get all... snappy."

You held your face tenderly, your eyes refusing to meet either Joker or Harley's gaze.

How come she could love him so much? You didn't understand. I mean, you could sympathize, but not... Empathize. You met gazes with Harley, who looked a little sensitive but otherwise fine. You smiled weakly and nodded at her; she gave you a quick wink before smiling and rubbing your arm.

"Mista' J's punishments seem a little more like pleasure to me, but maybe I'm biased. See what happens, honey."

"Come on, Harley. We've gotta fucking go." Joker spat out, stalking off. Harley waved an over-enthusiastic goodbye, beaming and blowing kisses. You smiled, nodding at the woman.

Who knows, it hadn't been so bad since you moved into the house. Maybe you could make a pros and cons list?