Colours Of Fear

and I don't know where to look

    I walked out into the chilly breeze of the evening. My hand still shaking out of anger at Cole's choices. My breath was visible in the night air. I took out my phone and called Lloyd.

"Hi", I said choking on my words.

"Hey", He replied cockily and annoyed.

"Please forgive me for what I've ever done. I feel like shit for hurting you and everyone else.  New Year's was rough I know and I know you said you'd never give me a second chance. I just- I just.... Please give me a second change even though maybe I've already gotten a few. I need you in my life, you're the only one who's keeping me together. I just want to hold you in my arms and sit in front of the fire place, watching old Christmas movies because that's what we do. That's what we did. Even when it wasn't Christmas, I knew I could come home from work and hold you in my arms watching A Christmas Story or something like that", I sniffled and let the tears roll down onto my face, "I don't know why I've messed up so many times and I'm just realizing now that I need someone there for me, someone that I could trust. Please, please, Lloyd, ple-", I let my phone slip out of my hands and I fell onto the sidewalk in front of Nya's house, balling my eyes out.

The phone bursted with the loud, "hung up", noise. My heart broke into a thousand pieces and I lost some whilst trying to pick them up. But anyway, what's so good about picking up the pieces. It'll just shatter again.

I watched as a car pulled up into Nya's drive way with their flashers on. Zane walked out of the car and placed his hand out for me. I shook my head denying his help and stood up on my own.

I fell into Zane's arm and hugged him like a child hugs their parents.

"Let's not talk about New Year's ever again and I'll drive you over to Lloyd's, he's a mess right now, just like you", Zane smirked and opened the passenger side door for me.

I slid into the black leather seats and stared in front of me at the house that everything gets fucked up in. My sisters house. New Year's happened there, Halloween was a bust that year too, Thanksgiving sucked, and Christmas well Christmas was just Christmas.