Falling to Pieces

Chapter 23 - Recovery

"Why didn't you say anything, Jess?" Zach questioned. His eyes were glassy, but his stressed posture was enough for me to understand that he was still angry. Letting out a grunt, Zach spun around and rushed out the door of the motel rashly.

"Zach," I called after him. Quickly, I made my way out the door and approached him.

He was standing at the corner, staring at the wall with his hands clung tightly to the back of his neck. The wind was blowing like crazy, but I could still hear Zach taking in deep breaths, trying to calm himself. Watching Zach like this was making my heart race. I knew that he was upset-furious even-with everything that had happened, but he was controlling it. And I was so thankful for that because I don't think I'd be able to handle him being mad at me right now. But at the same time, I didn't want him to be like this, I needed him to talk to me.

"I'm sorry. I know I should have told you that Will was threatening me. I'm so, so sorry," I said regretfully. Everything inside of me was beginning to shake. I wasn't usually like this, but for some reason, I was losing control and it was really getting to me. To add to my anxiety, all I got in response was his head of thick chestnut hair and defined back muscles looking back at me. Every view of him was absolutely amazing, even when he was this mad. Mad. I needed to focus on why Zach was mad, not why Zach was perfect. "Please say something, Zach," I pleaded, my voice nearly cracking.

"I...," he stopped suddenly, dropping his hands to his sides. After a few moments of stillness, his fingers flinched, as if he was hesitant to do something.

I furrowed my eyebrows, biting my lip nervously. What was going on with him? I moved closer, stopping only a few inches away from Zach. Was I supposed to comfort him? Was I supposed to beg him to talk to me? You never know what to do, Jess! "Zach-"

"I should have known something was going on," he huffed irately.

I dug my teeth into my lower lip in frustration. "No, I shouldn't have lied to you."

Zach sucked in his stomach. "But I knew that something was holding you back from being with me, Jess. That day at my Grandfather's house, you were trying so hard to keep it in, but I could sense that you felt the same way about me, as I do you." All of a sudden, I noticed his fingers curl up and soon enough, they were tightened in his firm fist. "Gah," he growled in frustration.

My insides were twisting, and as if it were a surprise, a cracking noise flooded my ears. I brought my eyes up, and when my gaze met Zach's hand crushed against the brick wall, I felt like my heart had stopped. "Zach!"

"I knew something was wrong! I should have guessed it was Will," he spoke furiously through clenched teeth, "I would have been able to do something!" He brought his arm up again, but I acted fast, pulling it back with all the strength I had.

Pressing my nose into his shoulder, I breathed in his calming scent. "No, Zach, please don't do this," I muffled while biting on my lip and willing myself not to cry. It was so hard to keep in my emotions because at this point, the only thing I wanted to do was burst into tears while in Zach's arms. I took in a deep breath and sandwiched Zach's hand between both of mine, cupping the tender part of his knuckles where his skin had peeled off.

More quiet moments passed by, making the tension inside of me rise. Zach had just hurt himself; I couldn't imagine how frustrated he must be right now. A sense of guilt was rising in me. If I had told him the truth from the beginning, instead of trying to solve things on my own, then we wouldn't be in this situation. I shut my eyes, and took in a panicked breath of air. The shivers from inside were now surfacing my skin-both because of the cold weather and my nervousness.