Mistake ♦ Romitri

Chapter 13

Thank you, everyone, for OVER 100 FRICKIN' VOTES! Originally I thought no one would like this because I'm English and I write different to a lot of Americans but I've had so much amazing response so just thank you, all of you! (Also I can't write for my life XD) 

I just found out I also got 22+ votes in ONE FRICKIN DAY. Thank you all AGAIN!

I felt like I was on the clouds again. I felt free again. The paranoia and fear of what was about to come had dissipated and left me drowning in emotions in my room. I felt as if nothing mattered. Why didn't I just leave now? I didn't want to stay in that hell-hole so what was stopping me from leaving?

Dimitri.

It was the sad, painful truth. I had fallen too hard this time. Sure, I had boyfriends in the past but this- this was new. This was blissful and wonderful yet it hurt more than anything. It felt the same as the grief I felt as the last of my family died. My mind was dragged to thoughts of Dimitri dying and my sudden good mood dropped to rock bottom. Nothing helped this feeling.

I imagined him hitting rocks in the sea and blood spilling from his head and the life dying from his eyes. Then him being pushed from skyscrapers and his bloody body hitting the ground, crippling him until his last breath took him away.

New scenarios came seconds after the last and the tears went from droplets to tsunamis. The pain was agonising and it was all in my own mind. It wasn't real but no matter how many times I said it, I didn't believe it. It was all too real.

Something was wrong with what I took. This didn't normally happen. I trusted people I never should have trusted. I took things I never should have took. My life was rapidly going downhill and I had no part in being able to stop it.

I felt the bile in my throat and the familiar feeling of sickness. My stomach churned and I ran for the bathroom without clearing my room. The empty vodka bottles and the small packet of what I had just taken lay in an open box as I let myself throw up all I had eaten. Every wretch, I felt worse.

My head hurt but my stomach calmed as I leant my head over the toilet waiting for the headache to pass. To my misfortune, it didn't. My head pounded and I had a bad feeling in my stomach. That's when I heard the only thing that would make today worse. The heavy footsteps pounding around my room, the familiar sound of a snoop. Crap! If another kid was in here and saw this my life would be ruined. I ran out, ignoring my bodies pleas to lie back down.

I entered the room and stopped in my tracks- Dimitri. He had collected each and every bottle. Each and every drug. Everything I felt I had relied on for the past months. He crossed his arms and faced me with a far off look in his eyes.

'You had a problem, Roza.' He took a step towards me. 'But this...' He seemed lost for words but more noticeably angry. He took another step closer. I felt desperate to move back but he struck fear into me. 'This is a death sentence. This is addiction. Look at yourself!' He raised his voice and I went to look in the small mirror in my room.

I was a mess. My eyes were red, not only from crying, and my hair was clinging to my cheeks. My eyes were also bloodshot and when Dimitri turned the light on, I flinched in pain. Seeing I was unable to adjust to the light, Dimitri turned them off again. Now, the only light in the room came from the moonlight shining lightly through the small window.

I looked at Dimitri's silhouette and forgot everything. He was so beautiful. I was so out of it that I couldn't concentrate on anything but him. My mind did nothing but my body ran to Dimitri and I clutched to him as if he was my lifeline. 'I love you too.' He said and I looked up at him with teary eyes. 'You never let me say it, Roza. However bad this situation is, I will always love you. Don't forget that.' I smiled, bleary eyes and crushed him against me again. I felt desperate for his lips but knew I wasn't allowed near them.

He held me to his chest as I cried. It was worst than ever and it only accentuated the headache that was hammering against my skull. 'Thank you.' I breathed.

'For what?' He asked, raising an eyebrow.

'For everything. For you. For what you just said. For giving me a future. For letting me forget my past. For love.' It was true for both of us. We were both in agony as we held ourselves at a distance. Chained away from each other by the law, by the norms of society. Everything of our relationship was forbidden and looked upon by others with disgust. But, I didn't care. I didn't want to care.

Love has such funny ways, such painful ways. I only had a last a year, we only had to last a year. Once it had passed we were free. Suddenly, society would accept us. It only shows how stupid it was. We could hold off our love until then but there was no denying our love. We would love from a distance but nonetheless love.

I had a problem, an addiction but Dimitri would help me. We would get through it together. Living together, however painful, was a necessity to me. I had never met a man as kind as him. I had friends now, some of which are boys, and I wouldn't doubt for a second that they are kind but to help a torn girl who is alone in her own world is the kindest thing a person can do, man or woman.

It wasn't just love that held us together, it was trust and kindness. It was the foundations of the relationship that we relied on. I felt like nothing could break my trust with him and as he held me on my bed, I knew that I was safe with him. No matter the situation, he would be there for me.

'I love you.' He murmured into my hair.

'I love you too.'

word count: 1103