The Challenge

"You broke my sandwich."

People say the worst feeling in the world is loving someone who doesn't love you back; that nothing hurts more then watching the one you love loving someone else.
I disagree.

I say the worst feeling in the world is loving someone and knowing they love you back but you continue to screw up every chance you have. That pain is indescribable. When you know that you could have had the chance to be the happiest person alive but still continue to mess things up for yourself over and over again.

I could picture every moment; every perfect moment that I could have had. Then it's all gone in a single burning flash. And it's all my fault.

I know it is because for some reason I always find a way to screw things up. To destroy any chance of a good thing coming my way. I always say the wrong thing at the wrong time and I never bother to fix it. I always assumed that things would magically heal themselves if it was meant to be. I wouldn't have to do anything or own up to my actions.

But watching Lilly walk away from me was like getting punched in the gut. I felt like I was crashing from cloud nine and I hit the ground with a brutal force that knocked the air from my lungs.

I chased after her, pushing people to the ground when they stood in my way. I mumbled some sort of an apology but truthfully there was only understandable thought running through my head. Lilly.

I pushed through the doors and flew down the school steps with a strength I didn't know I had in me. My eyes frantically scanned the parking lot, looking for that familiar head of hair. I found her speed walking to her car at the corner of the lot. Without a single coherent thought in my head, I ran after her, pushing past a worked up Anna along the way.

"Hey!" Anna yelled, as she nearly fell to the ground, catching herself just in time.

"Sorry!" I shouted over my shoulder, although I'm sure I didn't sound the least bit apologetic.

I heard her shout something in reply but I couldn't make out any of the words. They all blended together into some angry fireball of hate.

"Lilly!" I called, watching her freeze for a second before continuing to walk to her car but at a much faster pace.

I finally reached her, grabbing her arm and turning her around to face me.

"Lilly," I gasped, taking deep long breaths.

I put my hands on my knees, trying to get some air in my lungs. I groaned, wiping the sweat off my forehead. A hand gripped my side as it began to ache from the burning workout I just had. Man, you would think from all the sports I play, I could handle a run across the parking lot. I saw Lilly roll her eyes and turn around to walk away. My hand latched around her wrist, pulling her back in place.

"Dustin. I'm not really in the mood to hear anything you have to say," she spat at me.

"Wait," I pleaded, my hands still gripped her wrist, desperate not to let her slip away from me. "Please just hear me out."

She stepped closer to me. Her glare burned holes in my skin as her eyes hardened. "You don't deserve to be heard out. You deserve to rot in hell along with all of your other stupid, childish friends."

I took a step back in shock, my hands dropping to my sides. Lilly's normal, radiant eyes that used to be so easy for me to read were blank and indifferent. She didn't seem upset or even angry with me. Her eyes almost looked like she was bored with me; like I wasn't even worth an emotion anymore.

A beat passed before she finally turned around and walked away.
She only made it a few feet before I bolted after her.

"Lilly!" I shouted, desperately. "Lilly, please! I'm sorry."