You Can't Be Too Careful [Star Trek/Leonard "Bones" McCoy Love Story]

[1.] Butterflies & Problematic Hair

[1] Butterflies & Problematic Hair

Butterflies.

            Literally all I could feel was butterflies. No fear, no excitement, no anxiety, just…butterflies. They were probably a combination of all three, but in all honesty, I just didn’t know what to feel. Was I excited? Yes, of course. Was I anxious? Please, I had been anxious just turning in my application; of course I was anxious. I’m an anxious person to begin with. But they weren’t excited butterflies, and they weren’t anxious butterflies. They just…were.

            I was sitting on my suitcase with my chin resting in my hands and my elbows resting atop my knees. I was wearing my dad’s old Queen t-shirt and my favorite pair of jeans that were so worn down that there were gaping holes at the knees and tatters along the hem. I wore no makeup around my almond brown eyes, knowing that I would be traveling and that makeup would not help the disgusting look I was bound to have after I arrived at my destination. I took a moment to run my shaking fingers through my wavy, russet brown hair that fell past my waist. Usually I considered my hair to be an inconvenience, but today, it was a blessing. I dropped my head to my knees and allowed it to fall over my shoulders, hiding me from the rest of the world.

            This is your dream, Catherine, I thought. You need to stop worrying. Dad will be fine. You’ll get your training and work for Starfleet, just like you decided you would when you were eight years old. I sighed and rested my chin in my palms once more. Despite my attempt at a self-given “pep talk”, I knew that what I was trying to convince myself of wasn’t entirely true. Yes, it was my dream to join Starfleet, and yes, I would be able to get training in my area of expertise. But Dad would not be fine, and that was all the more reason to feel apprehensive about the impending future. The doctors had said that he was getting worse, and soon enough, they would have to take him into their care. Permanently. I fought back tears as the thought of him being alone began to overwhelm me.

            A sharp knock at the door startled me, causing me to flinch, which led to me standing up quickly and smacking my head on the corner of the counter, turning in a circle because my hair got caught in a drawer, and falling flat on my face because at that point I couldn’t see with my wild tendrils and black spots in my eyes. I know people always compete for the “clumsiest person in the world” title, but let’s face it: I am the champion of that contest. I’ve been the winner since I was a small child. And even though many people find it to be a cute quality, let me just tell you: it’s really not. I am literally a walking, breathing fire hazard-a serious danger to those around me.

            Wincing and rubbing my head, I got to my feet and went to open the door.

            “Astrid,” I greeted, giving a lame smile.

            “Catherine!” she cried, throwing her arms around me.

            I stumbled a little at first, but (surprisingly) caught myself before I went tumbling with the both of us still entwined.

            “Today’s the day!” she said excitedly.

            “Yep,” I replied shakily.

            “Oh, fer goodness sakes, lass! Calm down, would ya? This is yer dream!”

            “I know, I know. I’m just…nervous, is all.”

            “Why’re ya nervous? It’s an adventure! Haven’t ya always wanted ta go on an adventure?”

“When I was younger, yes. But, things are different now,” I said, casting a glance down the adjacent hallway.