Dare to Fall

Chapter XVIII

"Yeah, so, what do you think?" She asks again.

"It's fine."

"Great. I'm off then," She says as she grabs a clutch that was sitting on her bed and walked past me as she walks down the stairs. "Just order some dinner for you and Amelia, okay?"

I watch her look at her own reflection at the mirror as she wore diamonds earrings that match her necklace. She opened her clutch and fished something inside, "Here," she placed a hundred dollar on the coffee table.

"Goodbye," She says as she gives me a peck on my forehead before leaving for another date tonight. I watch as she closes the front door as the sound echoes through the hallway. I look up and saw Amelia going down the stairs with her phone on her hand.

She reached the ground and looked at me, "Where's your mom?" She asked.

"You just missed her," I say and she gave me a questioning look, "She just left for a date."

I added as I walk inside the living room and sat on the couch, turning the TV on. Amelia sat beside me, placing her feet on the table. "So, it's true about what you said."

I looked at her and gave her a questioning look, "About your mom dating a different guy mostly every night," She says and I nodded my head, not proud of the idea.

"I know you are against it but if I were you, I honestly would be against it as well but if my mom's happy about it then I'll just be happy for her."

I look at her as she grabs the remote control from me and starts searching for movies on Netflix. I thought about the words Amelia had just said and I actually agree about it, that it's true that if my mom's happy about it, I would happy about it too.

But why can't I be happy for her? Maybe it's because I still can't move on about my father's death? or the fact that my mom wants to find a new husband and a new father figure in my life?

"You know, I sometimes miss what it feels like to have a complete family," I say out of nowhere as Amelia placed the remote down on the table, faced her body directed to me as I turn my head to look at her. "I just miss my dad."

"Well," Amelia starts, "Remember when you told me to move on?" She asks as I nodded my head without saying a word.

"Some people choose people to move on and some people choose to stay but for me, I would rather stay than to move on because why would I even move on from something that is completely nothing? Do you get me?" She says and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

"It's like this... You choose not to move on because you still love your dad and you believe at the fact that no one can replace your dad. Your decision is the same as mine but yours, you chose not to move on because there is something there--there's someone there."

"But do you think that I'm being selfish by not being happy for my mom?" I asked and she shook her head. "So, are you saying that it's a no, then?"

"No," she says, "Nor that I am saying that it is a yes as well because honestly, I don't know what state your mom is at so, only you can answer that question yourself."

"Because maybe she's just dating just to satisfy herself or not to be lonely, we don't know... or maybe, I don't know since she's not my mother. Why don't you go and find out?" She says as I roll my eyes.

My face suddenly became serious, "Why would I? I have no interest in knowing any of the guys she's dating," I said bitterly as I grabbed the remote and pressed the button 'play' to watch the movie Amelia chose.

"Suit yourself."

I turn my head towards Amelia's face, "But you know, I'm happy for you for choosing your own decision because you know yourself well and I... don't, which is why I am happy," I say.