Struggles of a Fangirl

Struggle #44

 I shake my head, "Nothing, it's not big deal." There's no way in hell that I'm telling Princeton Prodigy and I kissed. That would make things tense and hella awkward. Plus they're best friends, I'm not about to rain on his parade, even though he already knows I have some feelings for Prod. "So how's things with London?"

 "We're still on our break. To my surprise she's been taking things easy and isnt rushing me. She's been a little quiet though...maybe I was a bit harsh on her by dropping the bomb so suddenly." Princeton replies, his eyes locked on a point on the wall. I can practically see the gears turning in his head as he thinks and it gives me time to think too.

 I don't want to have another restless night like last night. I want to go to sleep with a clear conciounsee and not have to worry about Princeton hating me. I should just lay it all out on the table right now and get is over with. My dads words from last night echo in my head: "The longer you wait the more you hurt yourself."

 Taking in a deep breath, I turn to Prince and touch his hand that's resting on the floor. He turns to look at me with an intenst gaze that catches me off guard. I swallow, trying to ease my dry throat. "Prince, I gotta tell you something. And you might not like it but...I can't hold it back any longer." He blinks, curiosity clouding his eyes and a worried frown settling on his lips. "I lied to you Prince." His eyes flicker but he doesnt say anything so I continue.

 "I told you that I was going to help you get London, I told you that I wanted what's best for you. But...I've kinda been decieving you this whole time." I admit, my voice shaking a little bit from my nerves. "I didnt think that London was right for you. She's a gold digger and you're so much more down to earth than that. I was trying to turn her against you, make you seem so out of her perfrences that she would just leave you alone. But all this time, you're the one I've been hurting most." I pause to take a much needed deep breath, Princeton continues to stare at me. "I've been feeding you all these lies about London. She hates boys with unnecesarry piercings, she thinks boys watching project runway is gay and she really isnt into the whole vintage theme. I made you look and act a hot mess so that she would lose interest and you would come to me. I played you the whole time."

 The air thickens with tension as he stares at me. His eyes stay locked on mine and his face is blank. My throat closes up as panic sets in. He hates me, he freaking hates me. Tears prick at my eyes and I want to speak but I know it wont come out clearly. "Prince I'm so sorry." I croak out, a tear spilling over my eyelid. Here come the water works.

 Princeton blinks, "Wow...that is so messed up in so many ways." He says, "But I'm not surprised."

 My face contorts into confusion, "What?"

 "I kind figured it out Kacey. During the BET awards she was all over me, posing my for pictures, holding my hand, clinging to me like her life depended on it. But before that she seemed only vaguely interested in me unless you, the girls or the boys were around." He tells me, rolling his eyes again.

 "Then why did you stick with her all this time?" I ask angrily.

 "Because I didnt want to admit that everyone was right. I didnt want to have my ass handed to me because I didnt listen to my best friends or anyone else that warned me. And you were getting cozy with Prod so that made me look even more pathetic." He says, "I was blinded by her beauty from the start. A pretty face doesnt mean a pretty soul though."

 I run my fingers through my messy hair, sighing with relief. "All this time I've been worrying that you would hate me. Now I hate you cuz you had me stressing for no reason!" I grab a cushion off the couch and slap him in the face with it.

 "Hey!" He laughs, snatching the cushion and throwing it away from my reach. I smile, happy that this turned out better than expected. Princeton keeps gazing at me, a lazy smile lingering on his face, He reaches up and uses his thumb to gently wipe the single tear that never compeltely fell. "You're lucky I forgive so eaily...I couldn't finish out this tour without my best friend." We both chuckle, basking in this sweet moment.

 All of a sudden Prince does the unexpected...he cups my chin and pulls me towards his face while he leans in towards me. Our lips meet in the middle and I'm too caught off guard to fight him back, all I can do is let my eyes slowly shut as the warm smell of his cologne takes over my senses. He smells so good. Jeezus this boy smells good. His hair smells good too. Oh that remind me!

 I find myself reaching up and gently running my fingers through his hair.

 Yup...that feels nice.

 OMG AIR. I NEED AIR AGAIN!

 I dont get a chance to push Prince back because he gently pulls away from me, opening his eyes and biting his lip. I sit there like a gaping fish, my mouth hanging open and my eyes staring at him. "Prince..." I whisper.

 "I know you and Prod have something going on already....but dont forget who you fell for first." Prince tells me in a husky voice. "You can't ignore feelings, you can only be distracted by something else.

 We stare at eachother in complete silence. Can he hear how hard my heart is pounding in my chest? Does he know that my head is spinning in never ending circles right now?

 Just then I hear a faint click, like a door closing. Prince did say everyone else is downstairs or in the boys room...right?

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lmfao I got yall FEELIN SOME TYPE OF WAY (sings)

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exscuse my errors :)