Struggles of a Fangirl

Struggle #35

I wake up the next morning some soft chatter and someone pacing back and forth. The sun is just beginning to peek through the windows of the hotel room and I blink the lingering sleep away in my eyes. I share a room with Renee and from what I can tell she's still fast asleep in bed. Throwing the blankets off of me, I slip on some socks and pull open the door to walk down the hall where the talking is coming from.

 Peering into the living room, I find London walking back and forth through the living room with her phone pressed against her air. She's dressed in matching pajama shorts and flimsy t-shirt, her hair is in a messy bun will tendrils sticking out all over the place. The tv is on the new channel and a smile is on her face as she talks into the phone. "Yeah we're gonna be on tv and everything. We already went shopping and I made sure to get the best outfit." She says, I roll my eyes as she continues. "I just wish you were here to see me."

 My ears perk up, could she be talking to a boy? I know she's mean but she wouldn't stoop so low to the point that she's leading Prince on when some other boy is already lined up for her affection. I listen closely as London walks back and forth, obviously one of those people who can't stay still when they're on the phone.

 "Yeah it's gonna be live. We're flying back to L.A tomorrow for sound check then the next day is the awards. Make sure you look for Mindless Behavior because I coordinated their outfits, there's no way I was gonna let them arrive looking a hot mess." She says with attitude, placing a hand on her hip. I shake my head, the most "work" London has done is used the sewing machine to embellish one of the boys jackets. Other than that she sat on the couches at the design studio with her headphones plugged in, eyeing us critically as we put the boys outfits together.

 London starts to skip around the room, a wide smile on her face as she listens to whatever the person is saying to her. "You're gonna tune in and watch us on the red carpet right? Because I--" Her sentence is cut short and she skids to a stop, the smile disappearing from her face. From where I'm standing I can see her posture turn rigid and her fingers clench. "You always do this to me! Everytime something exciting happens to me you don't have time to notice it."

 My eyebrows shoot up, someone who doesn't obey to London's every command? Who is this mystery person. London sucks her teeth, "Don't even try to front ma. When was the last time you were there for me? You're always busy with work and when I talk to you you're mind is somewhere else." She paces the room again, her steps heavier than before. "Oh please! You're feeding me pure bullshit!" She hisses, "No I won't watch my mouth. How hard is it to turn on a damn tv just to watch your only daughter walk the red carpet at a stupid awards show? I turn on the tv and watch you broadcast the stupid news everyday!"

 That's why she's so obessed with the news. It's her way of bonding with her mother even though she's all the way in Boston while London is out here. "You're never there for me. This is the first call I'm getting from you in two weeks....I don't care if you were in New York doing an investigation, what's more important? Me and your job?" London's voice shakes like she's about to burst into tears. A lump wells up in my throat, I hate seeing people cry, even London. She may be a spoiled brat but no ones deserves to be ignored by their parents. No matter how much self confidence and independence she may have.

 London shakes her head, "Just forget this. Cuz when I'm famous, you won't have a choice but to pay attention to me. Screw your job and everything else you put before your only daughter!" London exclaims into the phone before ending the call and throwing it across the room. It lands on the wall infront of me and I shrink back into the shadows so she doesn't see me. London whirls around to face the window, yanking the scrunchie out of her hair and twisting her fingers into her dark locks. She groans loudly, pulling her fingers through her hair like she's trying to put every strand out. Her shoulders shake as a soft sniffle escapes her.

 I can't help it, I emerge from the shadows and pick up her phone. I grasp it nervously and walk over to her, lightly tapping her shoulder. She spins around quickly, her swollen red eyes reflecting surprise as she looks at me. "What are you doing?" She asks me, her voice soft.

 Without much thought, I wrap my arms around London in a warm embrace. Even the hardest people are a little soft around the edges. Sometimes they need a little affection to cheer them up. Instead of reacting like I thought she would, London pushes me off her and glares at me. "Why are you touching me?" She asks.

 I stand there dumbfounded for a moment, I should have expected that reaction from her. We've been shooting daggers at eachother for a while now so a hug caught both of us off guard. "I-I heard your talk with you mom. I thought you might need something to cheer you up."

 London's mouth turns up into a scowl, "You were listening?" She shrieks, then she drops her eyes down to the phone in my hand. She snatches it out my hand so quickly I barely felt it being taken away. "Why are you creeping on me?"

 "I wasn't! I heard you talking and walking around and came to see what was going on." I tell her, "Look London I know we're not the best of friends but it doesn't take a genius to realize you act the way you do because you feel neglected. I've been trying to figure out why you act so egotistic all the time and I think I figured it out. It's because your mom doesn't pay attention to you and she's too wrapped up in her job as a reporter." I breath out slowly, "Isn't it?"

 London's green eyes flash and she inhales deeply before sighing. Her face stays blank as she tilts her head and looks down her nose at me like I'm some peasant. "That is none of your concern, why do you always find it necessary to help people? I didn't ask for your help Kacey."

 I roll my eyes, "I'm sorry for actually caring about others London, that's just the kind of person I am. And I can relate to you in a way, my dad is a lawyer so sometimes I feel like I barely see him. He's like a ghost around the house, he's in the house but he's busy working out court cases and stuff like that. But I try not to let it bother me because I know he loves me, he tells us that enough times. Maybe if you and you're mom and you're dad---"

 "Do NOT mention my dad alright?" London snaps, "You think you've got me figured out? You're wrong. All I have is my mother and my brother, my dad is God knows where snorting up drugs." Her eyes gloss over as she stares at me, anger and sadness is written all over her face. "You really want to help me? Then leave me the hell alone. I don't care about you, so there's no need to care about me. I can handle myself...unlike others."

 "Why do you have to act like such a---"

 "A what?" London challenges me, stepping closer to my face to intimidate me.

 My heart drops a little at her intense glare, like a lioness ready to strike. I square my shoulders and meet her evil sneer, "A bitch." I blurt in her face. My heart pounds in my chest as London's eyes flash. She raises her hand like she's about to reach for my throat but I take off across the room before she can lay a finger on me. I run out the hotel room and down the hall, quickly pressing the elevator button. It dings open and I hop inside, my legs shaking dangerously.

 I am so dead.

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Runnnnnnnnnnnn Kacey!!!!! lol

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*sorry for errors*