Heronstairs: A Fluff Collection

Weddings and Vows

A/N: Buckle up, everybody, this one's a long one. Over 5500 words. Brace yourself.

When Will announced out of nowhere at the breakfast table that he was getting married, Jem very nearly choked.

There was a long, shocked pause at the table before Jem finally spoke up.

"I didn't realize you and Six-Fingered Nigel had settled down so much," he deflected with a grin, mind racing to catch up to the situation.

Will shoved his shoulder good-naturedly. "You think you're so clever, you bastard. Some best friend you are. No, I mean Tessa and I... We want to be married."

Tessa, blushing across her cheeks on Will's other side, slid her hand into Will's as Charlotte, Jessamine, and Sophie all burst into excited shrieks of congratulations.

Jem could feel his heart breaking in his chest, but he smiled and clapped Will on the back. "Congratulations," he said to them both. "Once the ladies have stopped being quite so vocal, I assume you have details to work out?"

Tessa nodded with a smile. "We haven't decided much of anything, really. Just that we know we want to be together." She smiled up at Will, who kissed the back of her hand and returned her lovestruck gaze.

"Forever."

Jem managed to stop himself from rolling his eyes as the other members of the Institute quieted down, but it was a near thing.

Charlotte beamed at Tessa, the stress of running an Institute melting away at the prospect of a wedding. The conversation quickly turned to wedding details and the differences between Shadowhunter and mundane weddings and what details would come from which tradition.

Jem was quiet through most of the conversation, responding only if addressed directly, as his mind spun rapidly.

Will was getting married? His Will?

Half of him, the better half, was relieved that Will was finally letting someone else in. Relieved that Will would not be alone when he died, that the other half of his soul could not only survive after him, but thrive happily. The good, quiet, polite half of him meant every bit of the smile he'd offered the new couple and every word of the congratulations.

Behind the reaction anyone would expect, the other half of Jem burned. What was he to do now, without Will? Their relationship would alter drastically, and Jem's biggest fear of dying without Will by his side was seeming more of an inevitability. He had known Will was fond of Tessa- was even rather fond of her himself- but he had never expected this. The two people dearest to his heart, married? Leaving Jem alone or awkwardly intruding for whatever of his life remained?

He had loved Will since they were children, and now... Here they sat, Will newly eighteen just last week, an unexpected barrier slammed up between them.

A small voice in the back of his mind whispered that maybe if he hadn't waited so long, if he hadn't been such a coward, if he had simply confessed to Will, things might have been different.

How would he even explain it? How did one tell their best friend- their parabatai, the one you were forbidden to fall in love with- that they were the subject of every dream, the muse behind every song, and the one who's heart seemed to sing the perfect countermelody into the world?

Everything he'd wanted to say leapt to his mind, a physical ache in his chest as he forced them aside.

William, you are more dear to me than all the stars in the sky that I looked to for solace. I would live through this life and all its horrors a thousand times over just to have the chance to see you for the first time and feel my heart stop all over again. You are the walking visage of all that is good and worth fighting for in my life, despite your protests. You are the fire in my heart and the itch under my skin and the desperation in my veins, and try as I might, I cannot break your hold on me.