My journey to sexual purity. X

Sex drives are [gifts] from God

I grew up in a Christian home. My dad was a deacon, and my mom was an evangelist as well as my Sunday school teacher. We went to church several times a week, and we had weekly family devotionals for as far back as I can remember.

I accepted Christ and officially became a Christian at the tender age of 12. From age twelve all through high school I got very involved in my youth group. Despite how much homework I had I always attended weekly services. My summers were filled with mission's trips, church camp, and random hangouts with my youth group.

After graduating high school I went away for college, and very quickly got plugged into a campus ministry. I started doing personal evangelism (going up to random people and telling them about Jesus), going to Bible studies and worships nights, leading a small group Bible study, and serving on the executive board as the future vice president.

In the midst of all of that I'm also a 19 year old virgin who's never had a boyfriend, kissed a guy, or even held a guy's hand...other than during prayer lol (and even that's rare xD 😭😂😂😂).

I say all of this not to brag or anything, but to make a point.

This point being that despite my "clean" record and Christian upbringing I'm still just as much of a hormone raging teenager as the next. I'm still just as human, and consequently have the same desires as you.

With that in mind let's move on...

This morning when I woke up I found myself feeling very...erm...horny. :O 😱😱😱🙈🙈🙈

***Horny (adj): Feeling or arousing sexual excitement. Syn: aroused, sexually aroused, excited, passionate. ***

What?! Me?!

Instantly I felt guilty, dirty, and so disgusted with myself. I expected God to be angry with me. I instantly told Him I was sorry, and asked for forgiveness.

What He did next really surprised me.

He reminded me that it's not only normal to have a sex drive, but also healthy.

Many churches say that anything sex related outside of marriage is bad; no ifs ands or buts. Wanting it, thinking about it, being curious, all of it; bad.

However, craving sex and being curious about it isn't wrong. It's natural, and indicates that you're functioning the way that you were designed to.

The church paints this disgusting picture that puts God and sex in two different worlds. It makes it look as if the two can't go together when in reality the two were meant to coexist.

As contradictory as it may sound God actually created sex.

He created us as sexual beings. He created sex, and gave us sex drives as a gift to bring us closer to our spouses.

Ok that's a solid plan, but there's one issue...I have a sex drive NOW, and I'm no where close to being married xD 😂😂😂

Wouldn't it be so much easier if God could just turn off our sex drives until we were married? So why doesn't he.?

I don't know, but I do trust that it's for the best.

That's a nice way to think about it, but can I actually do about it? We have sex drives now, but can't act on them until we're married?? It feels like God's put us between a rock and hard place!

Your sex drive is partially triggered by age, but also by emotion. I've found that when I feel stressed, anxious, lonely, upset, or bored I start to feel horny.

The reason for this is it's simply one of the body's natural responses.

When a person has sex, or sexually acts out in general (reading steamy romance novels, watching porn, masturbating, etc.) endorphins are released. Endorphins are known as the "feel good" chemical, and as the name implies they make a person feel good!

Me feeling horny is simply one of my body's first routes to getting these endorphins released, and therefore relieving me of my feelings of stress, anxiety, lonliness, etc.

At this point you're probably thinking you're a slave to your body and that there's simply nothing you can do about it, but there is!

Although sometimes you body's first response to relive negative feelings (anger, anxiety, stress, etc) is through sexual activity, you don't have to act on it.

Endorphins are also released when you exercise, laugh, and eat certain foods (chocolate, strawberries, ice cream, pasta, bananas, oranges, grapes, nuts, and sesame seeds)!!

So to sum everything up know that having a sex drive doesn't make you a pervert...it makes you human. We were created as sexual beings. God gave us a sex drive, and created sex as a way to have a special bond with our spouse. The issue here is that we have a sex drive long before we're married...so what do we do in the mean time?

Feeling sexually aroused is simply one of the body's natural defenses against negative emotions, so don't beat yourself up and/or feel guilty about it. Although acting out sexually is one the body's first responses, the good news is you don't have to act on it. You can release endorphins by laughing, exercising, and eating certain foods :) 😱😊👍

The next time you feel horny know that it's natural, and that you don't have to act on it. Instead you can try watching a funny movie, hanging out with friends, going for a run, and/or enjoying a sundae J

It also really helps if you have a go to scripture that you can say on the spot. Right now one of my favorites is 1 Corinthians 10:13 "But remember this- the wrong desires that come into your life aren't anything new and different. Many others have faced exactly the same problems before you. And no temptation is irresistible. You can trust God to keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can't stand up against it, for he has promised this and will do what he says, He will show you how to escape temptation's power so that you can bear patiently against it." (TLB)

In the heat of the moment it can be hard to pray , but your prayers don't have to be long. My campus pastor says one of his favorite prayers is only one word long: "HELP" xD 😂😂😂👌👍

But in all seriousness don't be afraid to call out to God in the midst of temptation. Whether it's quoting scripture, or saying a short prayer, He hears it, and will come to your rescue. This may not be the body's natural defense, but it's definitely the best defense.

I hope this helps, and that in the midst of this long entry you were able to pick out at least one helpful thing xD Be sure to leave me a comment and let me know what you think!!

Lots of love, and God bless. X