Pests

Genus Part 6

I absolutely couldn't focus after that lunch meeting, so I decided to reach out and call Pete. Just to try to get my mind off the subject.

I eagerly dialed his number.

After the second ring, he picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hey man, sorry to bother you, I'm pretty sure you're at work, but would you be free to sneak out early and grab some drinks or something?"

He was kind of surprised at this call, but picked up the fact that I was anxious and needed to talk to someone.

"Hey Phil! Sure man, I can't get off early like, right now, but I actually get off in an hour. Where do you want to go?"

"Well, there's this divey place by me off of Grand Avenue if you are okay with that?"

"Sounds good sure. Are... are you okay Phil? Is something wrong, you're talking awfully fast and you sound stressed out"

I was annoyed by his comment. I didn't think I was that easy to read, but I guess I was wrong.

"Yeah.. Well, I'll tell you when I see you, but I'll text you the address. It's really close to me."

"Okay. You got it Phil. See in you in a bit."

"Sweet, talk to you then."

"Alright, later."

As soon as I hung up the phone, I thought about how much of a lunatic I would sound like if I were to show up, ranting and raving about this umbrella company.

He would think I'm ridiculous, he'd probably expect some other conspiracy theories to spew from my mouth... First FRAME, then, how the ancient aliens created all of the unexplainable, natural phenomena.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. My eyelids felt heavy. Ever since I moved over here I have not been sleeping well. This news from Adam wouldn't help with my insomnia. I would be up all night not sleeping and thinking about this garbage now.

I started to shut down everything I had on my computer. This consisted of tabs that had nothing to do with my work, it was movie review and film industry gossip sites. I doubt that anyone else in the office ever noticed, or cared either.

I yelled down the hallway, and didn't wait for a response.

"Adam? I have to run out early, so I will see you tomorrow! Thanks again for lunch! See ya man!"

After waiting another second or two for my computer to shut down, I grabbed my keys, cell phone, and bolted outside. I knew if I would have waited for a response I would have been trapped there with someone ridiculously time-consuming, tedious bullshit busy-work. I managed to make a pretty clean escape.

I sat down in my car, and as I was buckling in, I felt a nerve pop in the side of my head. It stung like a motherfucker. Unfortunately, I was used to this happening. From everything i've gleaned from my brief readings online, it's a blood pressure related thing. I took another moment, did some neck and shoulder stretches, and started to drive.

Should I be worried about this? That's been happening more and more.

Rather than be proactive and think about a solution to that, I synced my phone with my car's sound system and put on my old 90's playlist again. As much as I love seeking out new music and art; i've strongly felt the urge to regress to what I was listening to back in middle school and high school.

Is that indicative of something larger that I should be paying attention to? Or, again, am I thinking way too much?

I got lost in the music, it was some seriously embarrassing stuff.

Who the hell still listens to Lit and Rufio? And should I be sad or happy that I know all of the words to these songs?

Seeing as I got out of work really early, I didn't get swamped with the normal amount of infuriating traffic. The second time I sang the chorus to Rufio's "Angel Above Me" , I noticed I was almost home. This made me happy, but it was a short-lived happiness. My heart was pounding at a ferocious pace.

I quickly found a spot in my building's parking garage, and b-lined to the bar.

I think I should definitely have a cool down drink before I see Pete, or he might see how exasperated I am and think i'm insane.

As soon as I spent enough time to get out of my own head to pay attention to what I was doing and where I was going, I noticed that I was basically speed walking. The only people that did this were 50 years my senior and wore neon and shit.

Yeah, I definitely need to cool down some.

I halved my walking speed, but still was thinking at a mile per minute rate. Here was this insane opportunity I had, to be in the same room with these amazing, mythic figures I have heard about for all of my life, and the only thing I can think about it is how I could stand myself for being in a room with these people I loathed.

These people are some of the most vile in the industry, if not the world, because they have enough money to buy their way out of any scandal they encounter. Additionally, they are the people that are making the decisions to stifle the hopes and dreams of so many independent people I admire. Do I feign interest in them? Just grin and bear it? Or what? Should I follow Adam's lead and succumb to his smarmy bullshit and be led by example? Fuck that.

After finally getting to the bar, I was greeted by the bartender, Jules.

"Hey Phil, haven't seen ya in a bit, how ya been?"

I reluctantly smiled, and ignored her question.

"Can I get a double whiskey ginger? Oh, and sorry, I sort of have a one track mind right now and i'm meeting a friend in a little bit. I'm okay I guess."

She didn't need to respond with words, or thoughts to clearly communicate with me. Her contorted expression said enough.

Jules retracted her neck, slightly pursed her lips and squinted her eyes at me.

This clearly meant: Okay, well fuck you too. You better tip me well today.

"I promise you Jules, you'll get a bigger tip for me being a prick today... sorry."

She smiled again.

"Fine. When you want to talk to me, you always can, but whatever. Here's your drink."

I took my guard down a bit.

"Thanks. I'm gonna open a tab and wait for my friend over in that booth."

I gave her my card, and she sarcastically smiled and flipped me off.

I smiled back.

I thought my regular communication skills were bad, my non-verbal communication is horrible! I don't know what else to do aside from smile and nod.

I finally sat down in the booth and took that sweet, first sip of relief. This was my standard cocktail that I ordered ever since watching The Long Goodbye, Elliot Gould orders seven or eight of these drinks during the movie, and every time he does so he looks effortlessly cool. I always wished I could be like that. But maybe that just wasn't for me.

I took out my phone again to kill some time and wait for Pete. I immediately started playing some video games.

What was it with me and escapism? I never wanted to be present, in my circumstance.. I always wanted to break away from it.

At anout half way through the drink, Pete rushed in and sat down with me. However I was too enthralled in the game to even notice he sat down.

"So what's going on man?"

I jumped in my seat. Again and again, I find myself too caught up in my own world to notice anything or anyone around me.