Collide

I Have to Let Go

Chapter 18 ~ I Have to Let Go

"Emmaly?" I repeated to make sure that it was her and my mind wasn't playing tricks on me.

"Uh..Um...Hey, you..." She stuttered awkwardly and nervously.

I felt like I was dead for my whole life and I'm finally awake to see the truth ahold of me. Here I am, crying over two important people who left me in my life, only to be mooching off each other's faces in luxury hotels!

"You... You left me! You ran away two years ago, and now you're hooked up with him?" I shouted waving my hands everywhere angrily and stomping my feet on the stupid little carpet.

Emmaly whimpered and stepped back with Robert stepping in front of her, protectively. My knees weakened and my arms went limp. I wanted to be the girl that he was protecting. I wanted to be the one who he'd passionately kiss every time I came home. I wanted to be the one he loved.

These past four depressing years, I've always hung on to this little piece of hope that he might've actually meant what he said the last time I saw him... I'd hope that he'd actually loved me.

"I should've known that you'd forget about me..." I muttered, walking towards the door.

Ticks of electricity crept up my arm as Robert grabbed ahold of my forearm. He must've felt it too because he pulled his hand away, shaking it. I sighed, shaking my head and laughed with disbelief. I looked down as my feet dragged themselves across the black fur of the carpet towards the door.

I slowly turned the knob of the door expecting someone to beg- No, dare me not to go. When I opened the door, it was immediately shut back by a hand slamming the frame. Robert looked at me pleadingly with his chocolate brown puppy eyes. Where were those eyes four years ago?

"Emmaly, get out." Robert said flatly, but still looking at me, pleadingly.

"But--"

"Get out. Kaitlin and I have some unfinished buisness." He said opening the door and motioned for her to get out.

Just as she was about to walk through the door, she turned around and faced me with sorrow glistening in her eyes. I almost felt guilty but regained my stance, remembering how she left without a word. How she left me alone in the hell hole.

"I'm sorry Kate." She said her voice sincere and then she closed the door, letting faint sobs echo throughout the hallway as she walked away. I sat down on the couch, sinking into it's soft cushions.

"Kate--"

"No," I said. "Don't apologize. Because then I'll just be listening to more crap coming out of your mouth. You promised you would call, you promised you visit, you promised you would still love me! I would stay up until morning, waiting hours to see if your name would pop up on my telephone screen or if your car would pull up on my driveway. And here I am, one minute ago kissing Robert Downey Jr. who ends up making out with Emmaly the next minute!"

"Gosh, Kate! Would you let me explain?" He said frustrated.

"Sure, but whatever you say won't make me change my mind about the bullcrap lies you've been feeding me all these months."

"I'm sorry. ... I did come to visit you once but I saw Emmaly walking out on the streets and she looked so thin and tired and fragile. I picked her up and she'd told me that her parents kicked her out of her house, so I took her in. I promised myself that I would visit you some other day. But then, filming got more busy and I had no more time in my schedule because I had to take care of Emmaly. And she was my last memory of you, so I decided to give it a shot. Then I finally came to visit you, but when I rang your doorbell yesterday you weren't there. I waited for hours and instead, we meet up at that bar..."

I stayed silent, twiddling my thumbs. He sounds like he cared more about Emmaly..

"So, would you break up with Emmaly for me?"

I looked up at him after the long pause, but he was avoiding eye contact. "Robert?"

He looked at me with his eyes glassy and full of lies. I scoffed and got up from the couch but he held me down. He ran his hands through his hair and muttered words that I probably didn't wanna know.

"I'm sorry... Over these six months when we were together, I've kind of grown attached to her and it would hurt to kind of let her go because she comforted me when you were gone and--"

"Correction," I stated. "When you were gone. When you left me. When you hurt me. Just answer the question. Would you break up with her for me?"

He just shrugged nervously. I felt tears rolling down my cheeks as I stood up and pushed past him. His hand clasped around my wrist, but I tried to wiggle out of his grip which made him hold on tighter. He stroked my face with his hands but I turned my head the other way.

"Do you love me?" He asked.

"The question should be, do I still love you..." I muttered.

"Do you?" His voice cracked, on the verge of tears.

I shook my head and finally got out of his grip. I opened the door and struggled to get in the doorway. I turned around swiftly looking into his brown eyes, so badly wanting to stare at them for the rest of eternity. I sighed.

"I did. I did love you.." I mumbled.

Then I slammed the door and collasped on the floor in the hallway, clutching my knees to my chest. I put my back against the hotel door and banged my head against it. I sobbed silently as I heard things being thrown around on the other side of the room.

"And I still do." I murmured, burying my head into my arms.

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Is this sad?

Is this boring?

Is this bad?

Is this annoying?

sorry, im not good at limericks... :P

This is the end of Collide.

LOL NO JK. Next chapter will be up when I write it. :P

Ughh gotta study for a math test.

But, wait! I feel like writing a new story which is probably a bad idea but it keeps popping up into my head and the only way to get it out is for me to write. Anyways, back to the point: I need help with a blurb for the story! Please help! If you're interested, message me "I am happy that RDJ isn't my father because it would be wrong to lust over my own father."

LOL, you don't have to message me that, but just message if you wanna help me and I'll tell you about it.

Kayy bye. The end f Collide is FAR from here so don't worry. And I still need help with the new cover for Collide because this is horrible.. Kay bye. Mustache. oUT. :3