Bruised Hearts

Chapter 18

*Connor's P.O.V*

Darkness, that was all I could see, nothing, emptiness. I wanted to open my eyes but I couldn't. I scrunched up my nose and my eyebrows together, even though they probably didn't move in reality. What had happened? Was I dead? No, I couldn't be, I just got my boyfriend back, the only one that truly made me happy and proud of whom I was. The one that made me believe made me who I am today. I tried recalling what happened before I was literally in complete and utter empty motionless darkness.

*Flashback*

I rubbed my heavy eyes, finding my favourite blanket resting over my body, my body lying in Ethan's bed. How did I get here? Where's Ethan? I looked at my phone; I was sleeping for maybe half an hour? I scrolled down, a couple phone call's where being shown there from Landon's dad. I slid my finger over the notification to call back. After a couple rings he answered. My baby was fixed already. I told him to wait for me at home I'd be there in a bit. I got up and left the house, wondering where my boyfriend could have gone, I texted him telling him about the car and asking him of his whereabouts.

I reached Landon's house fairly quickly, heading straight for the garage. I stroked my other baby's hood, smiling down. I thanked his dad and smiled driving off. I heard my phone beep for texts a couple times but my focus was on the road, I wasn't about to check just for a couple texts. More came, then a call, two calls, three... I cringed and took my phone, still paying attention. It was my mom, I told her I was staying over for a few days, strange. I called her and patiently waited, and before I hung up she answered, asking, "yes" in a very worried and agitated tone.

"Mom? It's me, is everything okay?" I asked.

"Connor, I need to ask you something?" She replied, without answering any of my questions. I had a feeling where this was heading but I didn't want to jinx myself from thinking about it.

"Sure mom, what's up?"

"Is it true?" She asked cautiously.

"Is what true?" I asked innocently.

"Are you a homosexual?" She asked, and when she did my heart dropped, I started panicking, looking for my words.

"I-I... Who told you that?"

"Heard it from Beth, you know that boy Daniel's mom. She told me her son got beaten up by one of your friends because they were calling you a faggot. Are you a faggot Connor?" She asked, cringing at the insult. Her tone of voice was non-decipherable, should I go for it? She probably knows already.

"Look ma... I can explain..." I started before she cut me off.

"Connor I will not have a gay son, you understand me child, you are not gay!" I was crying at this point, my heart stung badly and my breaths were shorter.

"Mom... It's still me; I'm still the same, why does loving someone of the same sex be so bad? I'm happy with him."

"It's that boy huh, he's the one that turned you into this! You get over here and we'll fix you probably, get you far away from that disgusting piece of shit, Oh dear he probably infested you with aids now hasn't he! You are a disgrace you little faggot! How could you possibly have let this happen! No son of mine will be a faggot!" She yelled into the receiver. I tried to wipe my eyes, my vision too blurry, as soon as I looked up the sharp turn that I didn't anticipate was right there, I threw my phone on the passenger seat and held on to the wheel, trying to avoid it but it was too late, I closed my eyes and braced myself for the impact.

*End of Flashback*

I guess I'm dead then huh, I would've never guessed going this early in life, without even fulfilling my dreams. If death is just this boring blackness then man, nobody is missing out on anything, if only they knew there wasn't really anything after death, maybe the living world would be a better place. I thought back to what mom had said right before I crashed. If I could feel, I'd probably be crying right now. What a horrible way to go, honestly. I just wish I could feel Ethan's fingers in my hair, let my lips feel the softness of his just one more time. Suddenly I heard mutters, clanking noises and voices rising in the distance. A door creaked and soft footsteps approached me, however I couldn't see anything.