... I felt a throbbing sensation all over my body. Pulsating headache, rapid heartbeat, stinging sensation on my wrist, breathing difficulty, blur surroundings, and... darkness.
~~~
I slowly opened my eyes, and I was engaged with white walls. I tried to lift myself up with my arms but failed when I felt something on my wrists. My left wrist was covered with bandage and the other was attached to the dextrose.
I tried to remember what happened but I heard a knock and a doctor came in along with a nurse. She greeted me with a smile.
"Hello, Ms. Jauregui, you're awake! I'm doctor Richards." The woman with a white coat introduced herself and offered her hands for me to shake but I didn't take it because of the condition of my wrists so she took it back.
"We're glad you woke up after two days you've been here. Do you remember what happened?" She asked. I shook my head no.
"Okay... may I ask you a few questions?" The doctor asked and I said yes while looking blankly at the wall.
"So... Do you remember your name?" She asked.
"My name's Lauren... Lauren Jauregui." I answered immediately.
"Yes, of course." She said while writing something on a paper.
"Do you have family, friends, or anyone?"
"No, I live alone." I half lied.
"Okay... Do you remember something? Before you lost consciousness?" The doctor asked.
"Uhh..." I hesitated to answer at first as I tried to remember what happened and I remembered only some parts of what happened that night.
"I was in the drugstore. I bought some pills and alcohol. And I was in my bathroom. I think I was drunk. I was holding a blade and my wrist was bleeding... That's all I remembered" I said.
"Yeah... So... You were found by your roommate inside your bathroom. You were unconscious so she immediately called 911." The doctor informed.
"Lauren, are you going through something?" She asked and I nodded.
"That's why you tried to harm yourself and attempted suicide. But now you're safe. You were drunk, you used the blade to cut your wrist and drank the pills you bought. Then you passed out and you accidentally hit your head on the floor that's why you didn't remember some recent things you did." she said.
As I scrutinize the information the doctor said a few seconds ago, the memories came rushing through my mind. The reasons I was depressed and the reasons why I'm here at the hospital. Maybe it was better if I didn't remember. If only I had amnesia.
I didn't notice a tear fell from my eyes until a nurse gave me a bottle of water and a tissue. I took them both and wiped my tears with the tissue and took a sip of water.
"Thank you for answering my questions, Lauren. Take a rest and you can go home in two days. You have to stay here in the hospital for the next two days for us to examine you further and maintain your medication." The doctor informed me with a smile.
"Okay, thank you." I said without looking at her. She left with her nurse and I turned my head to look outside the window as I kept on thinking and remembering all the bad memories and mistakes I did.
----
A/N
Hey guys! Just wanna share my thoughts.
Comment or anything if you enjoy the story.
I'll update the next chapter tomorrow.
One more thing... Don't do suicide. That's bad.
-Cee
Update: 04/27/20
Hey! It's been 4 years since I wrote this story. Now I'm just trying to proofread everything. Thank you for reading this story and I hope you enjoy.
I also want to remind you all that life is a gift. Let us treasure it and never harm ourselves. Take care!
Update: 02/24/24
Hello, everyone! After 4 years since the last update, I never opened this account. Now that I did, I am actually proud of my 14 y.o. self for being able to come up with a story like this. I am now turning 23 this year and I am happy to be able to experience writing as a former harmonizer and camren shipper. Most especially that english is not my first language. This was the first ever book I wrote and will probably be the last. I am currently a college student in the field of medicine.
Once again, if you are going through something, don't be afraid to ask for help. As your future Doctor, I would like to tell my readers that your life is precious and I am here to save everyone as much as I possibly can. I love you all and I will surely give off my service for my love of all people with different gender, cultures, races, and beliefs. Have a good life and always be kind!
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Suicidal Love (Camren)
Fanfiction"It isn't suicide, It's called love." she said as she pulls the trigger. Warning: Suicidal
