Fix me (COMPLETED) #Wattys2016

Chapter Twenty Two

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Some words I thought I should explain in case someone wonders!

Dua'a: Supplication
Allah: The Arabic word, referring to God in Abrahamic religions.
Wudu: Ablution (purifying oneself before times of worship).
Qibla (Kaaba): The direction (towards Kaaba in Mecca) which Muslims face when praying.
Rabb: God (in Arabic).
The holy Quran: Islamic sacred book.
Hadith: A collection of sayings by our Prophet Muhammed (pbuh).
Surah: Chapter of the Quran.

(Unedited)

| Layla's POV |

Its funny how as soon as tragedy strikes or something bad happens to us it sends us running to raise our hands, making dua'a and kneeling on our prayer mats.

But where is our dua'a and prayers when something good happens in our life? Where is our faith when Allah grants us a blessing? When something good happens to us, we should be bowing down, kneeling in front of Allah and thanking him. But the truth is you don't need a reason to kneel in front of Allah and worshipping him, you just gotta do it because if the fact that you're still breathing isn't good enough of a reason then I don't know what is.

I sound like a hypocrite for merely thinking this, but I can't help it. I feel ashamed. Why am turning to Allah when I'm in need of something? Why have I left behind some of my faith with time?

I slipped and forgot. It's that simple. But one should never forget the God almighty, the most merciful, the most forgiving. And what did I do? I forgot.

The last few nights have been horrid. I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't concentrate. All I do is think, think some more and worry. What have I ever done to insult a person this much to make them hate me? Who is after me & my daughter? Who is so determined to hurt us? What kind of person wants to hurt an innocent child? Why does the fear and shame never leave my heart? Why have I slowly forgotten to ask Allah (swt) for help? For guidance? For forgiveness?

After that day at the picnic, I have been closed off from the world, even from my own daughter and specifically Adam. I don't want to speak to anyone. I need some time. I need to come up with something quick that would help me protect my angel and me. I can't tell Adam, he'll only get hurt in the process. I can't show any of this to him because if he ends up in danger, I would never be able to forgive myself.

The day after the picnic, I went over to Adam's house, with my lifeless form and asked him for a favor. I asked him to re-offer us the guestroom in his villa. I needed to be able to sleep at night knowing that there was a man close by that could protect us from harm. Since the person after us, already found a way into the pool house. Into the bedroom. And over to my bed. I would never be able to sleep peacefully there. My eyelids would never fall close knowing I am sleeping next to a spot where someone terrorizing us was there mere hours, possibly minutes before.

Adam, being the gentleman he sometimes is accepted immediately, and helped me move our stuff over to the guest room. He tried asking me if I was alright, saying he noticed that I seemed a little bit off. I shrugged it off, said a thank you in a monotone voice and left the room.

This is leads me to now. I am currently sitting on my bed in my new bedroom in the guest house. The same room where I had woken up the day Adam found me sick. Melak is sleeping on the bed next to me. I decide to do something I haven't done in a while.