Break The Cycle

Chapter 33:

Killian POV:

I never expected Neal to tell Henry the truth like that. In all honesty, Emma and I agreed he was too young and we would tell him later. I wasn't sure how she felt about him telling Henry now.

So when Emma made a beeline to go inside, I followed her with a nod to Neal.

"Love?" I said when I found her in the kitchen. She was standing over the island with a white knuckle grip on the edge of the counter. "Are you okay?"

"Henry didn't need to know all that." She mumbled.

"We should have talked to Neal about it. But you did ask him to be thoroughly honest with Henry." I pointed out.

"I know. But I didn't expect him to put himself on the line like that." She said, still staring at the counter.

"We're all grown ups now, he's accepted that what he did was wrong and he wants his son to know the truth before he dies. Henry seems to be taking it rather well."

"Yeah, he's a level headed kid. Sometimes I think he's smarter than me."

"Well it's out in the open. He's not mad at anyone, he loves you both." I rubbed her back to try to release some of the tension.

"I really need you right now, Killian." I know it took a lot for her to admit that. Emma didn't like needing anyone.

"I know, love." I kissed the side of her head. "I'm here for whatever you need."

She smiled at me and finally let go of the counter, leaning in to let me hold her.

"I don't know what to do." She quietly said.

"You just let Henry get to know his father as much as he can while they have time."

"How are we going to explain this to Henry when Neal is gone?"

"We'll work that out with him."

Later that day it was time for Neal to go. Henry was still outside so he came in to talk to us.

"Hey, um, we need to figure out what to tell Henry when I can't be around anymore." He said.

"We were just talking about that earlier." Emma replied.

"I think he might be too young to understand that I'm dying." Neal suggested.

"You would be surprised at how smart he can be. I think he would understand it, and it would be the best way to tell him without letting him think you just don't want to be around anymore." Emma explained.

"So you want to tell him the whole truth?" Neal raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. He'll get it. Now, about your parents..."

Neal put his hands up. "I'm not telling them. The only reason I want to see them is to tell them I'm dying and to ask why they up and left me one day."

Emma nodded and I knew she was thinking how incredibly relieved she was that Milah and Mr. Gold wouldn't be able to have an influence on Henry.

"There's one more thing. Now that I know about Henry, everything I have I want to go to him. You can put the money in a savings account for him to use later, and he can do whatever he wants with the things in my apartment." Neal had his head down.

Emma looked shocked for a moment there. "I, uh...thank you. I'm sure Henry will love that."

He nodded. "I'll see Henry this weekend then?"

"Yeah. We'll figure out something for you guys to do." She said.

"Killian." Neal nodded to me and made his way out.

Emma POV:

How am I going to sit Henry down and explain to him that his dad is sick and is going to die? Neal had no idea how much time he had left. I was also conflicted on how long this should go on. The longer that Neal was alive, the more Henry would get attached to him and it would make it harder. But he deserved time to get to know his dad.

I had to keep reminding myself of how wise and strong my son was. Sometimes I wonder where he got it from, it's definitely not from me or Neal. And I know for sure that there are times that I need him more than he needs me.

That night I was up late thinking about all this. The next day I was dragging my feet from lack of sleep, Killian seemed to take notice because he was helping me all over the place. When I finally made it home that afternoon, it felt like the world had beaten me down. I tried not to show it, Killian and Henry both had their own problems. But of course Killian saw right through that. When Henry went to bed, I sat on the couch with Killian next to me.

"Thank you for today." I said, kissing him on the cheek.

"I'm not sure what you mean, love." He smirked. I raised an eyebrow.

"Don't play dumb. I appreciate the help, all of it. I'm still getting used to someone caring about me that much." I said admiringly. It was true, until Killian, I had never once had anyone to lean on. All the little things he had been doing all day meant so much more than he thought.

"Get used to it, you've got enough on your mind, I wanted to ease it up a little."

I snuggled my way into his side and wrapped an arm around his front.

"Neal wants to take Henry out of the house this Saturday." I said.

"We'll go with them. What is it he's found to do?"

"Some kind of festival in a park. I looked it up, it looks great for Henry to have fun with."

"Excellent. We'll make a day out of it. You know Emma, Neal and I have talked some. I believe he's being sincere about his intentions. He talked to me about you."

I wasn't sure I wanted to hear this, but I nodded for him to continue anyway.

"He said he's happy you have me, that you and Henry both do. He said we're good for each other, we've both been in similar situations. But I don't think that's what pulled us together. It bonds us, we understand each other. But I don't love you because of that one reason."

I sat up now, extremely interested in what he had to say.

"You're an amazing woman, Emma. I know you had your walls up, but I've learned that you are very good at loving someone when you let them in. You're strong, good willed, and you're a hell of a mother. I can't express how much more I loved you when I watched you step up and take on the role of Henry's mother." He touched my cheek with the tips of his fingers. I leaned into his touch and placed my hand over his. That was when I realized I was crying.

"I love you, so much." I couldn't form very many words at the moment, so I just stared at him until they came to me. "I don't know what I did to deserve you."

"You bought coffee in the same cafe as me." He smirked and I laughed. My Killian, ever the joker.