I've Never Cried

Chapter Twenty-two - "I'm Just Trying to be Your Brother."

"I've Never Cried"

Chapter Twenty-Two

'I'm Just Trying to be Your Brother."

Joe's POV

"Nick!" I called, trudging down the stairs two nights later. Nick fell through the front door as it opened, hitting the threshold with his ankle. It was almost two in the morning, and I had no idea where he was. I raced over to him, lifting him to his heavy feet, and closed the door behind him.

"Joe, I'm fine!" He said, his speech slurred. I wasn't convinced.

"You're drunk." I told him, shoving him onto the nearby couch. He smelled of beer, and his clothes were soaking wet, which I didn't understand. "Did you drive here?" Nick studied me for a moment, and I stared at him. His face began to change colors, suddenly, and his eyes rolled back. He vomited all over the floor, then looked back up at me, smiled, and passed out.

"Wow," I said out loud, to no one in particular. I left him there.

--

When the sun came around, I went downstairs to check on Nick, who'd been passed out drunk all night. When I got to where I'd left him, he wasn't there, but the vomit still was. I walked through the kitchen and peered into the downstairs bathroom, finding Nick on his knees, his back convulsing as he retched into the toilet.

"Why'd you do it?" I asked, watching him in disappointment. He turned and looked at me, before turning back and continuing with the emptying of his stomach. When he caught a breath he said,

"That's none of your business." When he was sure he was done, he bumped my shoulder as he exited the bathroom.

"Nick," I said, and he turned angrily to me.

"What, Joe!" I shoved him backward.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Do you not realize how stupid it is to get that drunk?" He shoved me back, his voice getting louder.

"It's none of your fucking business, Joe!" I grabbed him by the collar, slamming him into the wall. His breathing increased angrily. He tried to shove me away, but I held him there.

"Yes it is! You could've killed yourself! What the hell were you thinking?" He swung at me, but I dodged it, decking him in the face one good time. "Don't try and pull that shit with me, Nick. You won't win." I still held him against the wall, one hand now on his throat. He coughed.

"I hope you don't think you can play the role of 'dad', Joe. Because you can't."

"Just tell me what was going through your head."

"Let me go!" He thrashed, spitting on me. I yanked him down, throwing him onto the floor, and wiping the spit off of my face.

"You've got a lot of nerve, little bro. But I'm gonna let that one go. Now what happened?" I demanded, this time, if he pulled anything, I'd kick his ass.

Nick pulled himself from the floor, and stood again to face me. The area under his eye began to swell. "I just didn't know how to handle it Joe, okay? The only girl that I've ever loved and probably will ever love, doesn't love me back. How else am I supposed to deal with that? Whenever I see you, you're sitting around, happy with Demi. You're so in love with her! I couldn't come to you."

"So you went to alcohol? Nick, that's not how things work. It's been over FOUR months. If you can't deal with something, you don't go out and risk your life being stupid!"

"You said you would talk to her!"

"You said you didn't want me to! I can't read your mind, Nick! You have to tell me what you want! You have to tell me what's wrong. I can't just guess." Nick glared at me.

"You're not my father, Joe. So don't pretend like you can be." He reached up and touched the bruise on his face that was now turning purple.

"I'm not." I said, putting a hand on his shoulder, stopping him. "I'm just trying to be your brother. You need to let me."

"Don't tell me what I need."

"It's not like you know." I said, walking over to the freezer, then the laundry room. He was silent for a moment,  glaring at me with a hand over his eye. I tossed him an ice pack. "Put that over your eye and shut the hell up." I shoved the mop his way. "And clean that shit up." I referenced at the vomit before heading back up the stairway.   

--

I called Demi later on that day. Her elegant voice filled my ears, and my mouth lifted into a smile.

"Hey Joe," She said, and I could hear the smile on her face as well. "Are we going somewhere again?" She giggled. I laughed at her sarcasm, then got serious.

"I actually just wanted to talk to you." I said.

"Alright.." Her voice saddened. She must've thought I was going to break up with her. I rushed to clean up the mess I made.

"No, Demi, not like that. I've just been wondering about Selena. Is she okay?" Her voice lightened again.

"I guess. I mean she's been a little off lately."

"Off how?" I wanted Demi to have already noticed Selena's flirtatious behaviors around me, but she neglected to mention it.

"Joe, why does this matter? Did she do something?" I was actually surprised that she didn't know. I thought to tell her that I was noticing a few things, but I could've just been me over-thinking Selena's advances. It didn't seem like something I should cause Demi to be concerned about, so I let it go and focused on Nick.

"Nick says she broke up with him a few months ago. He came home really drunk last night. He's still not over her." I admitted.

Demi was silent for a while. "I had no idea," I heard her breathe. "I would think she'd tell me, of all people. Should I say something to her?" She sounded genuinely worried.

"For some odd reason, Nick thinks that I am supposed to fix this. But do you think you can find out why?"

"Totally," She said in agreement. "I just don't get why she wouldn't tell me. Do you think she's jealous or something?" I paused. Maybe she did notice Selena's behavior when I was around.

"Jealous of what, Dem?" I asked, for clarity.

"Well maybe I've been spending so much time with you, she feels like she lost her best friend?"

I didn't think that was the case at all. Demi sighed, "I could just be over-analyzing... God, why wouldn't she tell me?"

I thought back to the various instances when I caught Selena staring, and I realized that she was never staring at Demi unless it was in some hateful or condescending way. However, anytime she was staring at me, it seemed flirty, or wishful. I thought it would be too much of a stretch to think that she'd sacrifice her relationship with both Nick and Demi for me: someone she'd only met a few months ago. So then what could it be? I obviously didn't know her well enough to know her mind, so I invested my inabilities into Demi instead.

"Don't be too obvious when you ask her what's up," I warned, that smile returning to my face. She laughed.

"Alright, alright. I'll see what I can do." I smiled.

"I love you," I replied, feeling those awesome knots. " A lot."

"I know," She said, sighing happily. "I love you, too."

"Bye."

"Bye."

JJDL