Alone [One Direction: Niall Horan]

Doll

-Niall's P.O.V- 

I sat inside Dr. Collins office again and she looked even more worried. I don't understand why everyone is more worried. After I broke my ugly reflection, I found out I didn't feel pain anymore. They should be more happy. That mean they don't have to worrie about me being in pain anymore.

"Niall, what happened that made you break the mirror?" Dr. Collins asked the same questions oh so many doctors at the hospital had asked me. I just sat her and fiddled with my fingers. I didn't have anything and it was upsetting me. I wanted to have something to fiddle with. It made me more comfortable.

I began shaking my hands a bit, trying to get this upsetting and dark feeling to come. I don't like this, but I know I can't fight it. It always swallows me. When Dr. Colllins stood up, I did the same, knowing my time was over. 

I sat down in a cahri outside and I decided I wanted to sit beside Elizabeth. The door closed, leaving the two of us alone in silence. I kept shaking my hands and drumming my right leg, still feeling kinda lost. I didn't have a grip. 

I suddenly stopped and looked down to my hands. In my hands I found a small stuffed toy. It was a small doll. She had a blue dress, and the face was blank but it had dark hair. I fiddled with it and looked to my left and found Elizabeth looking at me. We just looked at each other.

No words were exchanged and all too quickly the lads came back and dragged me out of the building. I got in my usual seat in the car. It's on the right side by the window. I looked out and fiddled with the small stuffed doll in my hands. 

"What do you have there?" I looked and then felt my hold on the doll disappear. I snapped my head to look at the thief and Zayn was looking at it. "Belongs to-." He read quietly. I snatched the doll from him quickly before he could read the name and held it in my hands. My fast heart beat slowed down as I got it back. I looked at him as his expression went to shock. 

I turned away from him again and looked back out the window. I moved the small doll up and held it gently to my mouth, brushing my lips against it, feeling the soft but rough fabric. I then dropped my hand back down and carefully fiddled with it, searching every little detail of it with my fingers only, not my eyes. I don't wanna do it with the lads around. I want to do it alone.

As I was home again, I went out in the garden. I kicked my shoes off to feel the soft green grass under my feet, keeping me somewhat grounded.

I got to the little park that is only able to be entered from the houses in the neightborhood. I sat down under my oak tree and leaned back on it. I've been coming here a lot lately. It's so quiet from people, but loads from nature. 

I like the feeling I get when I hear nature. I hear the wind, the birds, the animals, the grass, the leaves, everything. It's so nice and soothing.

I lifted up the doll and studdied it more. I sucked it every little detail about it. How it was sewed up on the right arm with a black, very vissable, thread. How it looked like it used to have a face, but it was removed. The dress it blue but has one dark drop on it, it actually seems like blood in my opinion.

Then you have the writing on her back. I pulled up the dress and stroked my fingers over the writing.

Belongs to Elizabeth Lily Sanders 

So that's her full name. I like it. In fact I love it. If I would say it, it would probably sound beautiful.

I got up again and held the doll in my hand while putting it safely in my pocket.

-Zayn's P.O.V- 

"I swear to God it said Elizabeth." I said again as I brought up the subject of the dark haired doll Niall hasn't let out of his sight for a week now.