Conversations From Afar

59 / a closet no longer

okayy i know all of you lovely reasonable young women think Kat is being jealous and immature but as I have stated in..hmm...every story, she's human she isn't perfect and really....everyone gets jealous sometimes sooooo pls chill

also, your faith in camther is heartwarming :):)
***

I feel so young and stupid. She must be at least twenty-five. Her hair is blond, her eyeliner is flawless, she smiles like she knows something I don't.

"Ellis?" I feel more hollow than I ever have.

"Hmm?" We sit in the back of the taxi and I sit on my phone to stop myself from staring at the pictures.

"Am I too young for him?"

"You're spiralling. Stop." It's not that simple. "Kat."

I stare at my hands, and his find my shoulders to turn me to him. The doubt feels heavy at the bottom of my stomach and he dips his head to look me in the eye.

"Cam loves you."

"Love isn't forever." Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. You're being stupid. Stop.

My eyes are squeezed shut and then his lips press to my cheek.

I pull away so fast my neck cricks. "What was that?" He sighs loudly. "You can't kiss me."

"Kat, I'm not trying to... okay, want to know something? Maybe this will distract you."

"What?" His eyes are steady with mine.

"I'm bi."

"That doesn't make me feel any better about you kissing me."

"On the cheek. It was a total friend-kiss."

"Still."

"And also, I have had a long-term unrequited crush on my straight friend Abel." His lips quirk up. "I think my situation is a little sadder than yours."

A giggle escapes me, for no reason other than that I wasn't expecting this, and I feel the teary sensation at the back of my throat. (But what about the drawable boy at the party?)

He pets my shoulder and I don't know why I freaked out so much. "It'll be okay."