PART 6: The Tournament

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"Throughout the first round, contestants will be paired up one versus the other and the challenge will be to eat an entire watermelon as quickly as possible." said MattyB.

"Contestants ready?" asked MattyB waiting for Jared and Shrek to give a thumbs up.

"Good luck. Just so you know, I can eat a whole footlong in 30 seconds." said Jared.

"That's child's play." said Shrek.

"On your mark, get set..." MattyB paused. "GOOO!!!"

Within twenty seconds, Shrek had eaten an entire watermelon, even the outside.  This made Cory very proud.

"So Jared, when you told me you can eat a whole footlong, were you trying to be funny?" asked Shrek.

"I'm gonna get back at you, Shrek." said Jared.

"You wouldn't like to see an Ogre when he's angry, would you?" asked Shrek.

Jared sat down in the audience.  As rounds passed, Paul Blart barely won his round.  Cory drilled his watermelon in 15 seconds, making a hat for Shrek and himself.

"First round is over!" said MattyB.

While Johnny was drinking some Kool-Aid at a table, he heard Jared threaten a kid.

"Now Ian, you better fucking win this and make your real Daddy proud enough not to turn your ass around tonight. If you don't win, I will open up your goddamn asshole wide enough to the point where I can eat cereal out of it and feed it to you!" said Jared.

Johnny knew he had to tell Blart, but at the right time.

"Bboys and Bgirls, Round two will not be the same as you saw in Round 1.  This time, four contestants will go in at the same time and only one will come out victorious." MattyB said. "Now, the rules are simple. First person to cut a hole open in a watermelon, bash it up to liquify it, and drink the watermelon juice WITHOUT chewing wins Round 2."

"Our first four contestants are Tyrone, Andre, Paul Blart, and Ian."said MattyB.

"Things are getting explosive now." said Osama.

"You very smart." said Khaled.

While Blart was bashing the inside of his watermelon and saw Ian was already chugging, he asked, "Ian, how are you doing this so quickly?"

"Oh, I learned how to fist and chug all from my uncle Jared." said Ian.

Blart was shocked at what he had heard and stopped bashing his watermelon. Five seconds later, Ian had finished drinking the watermelon juice from the hole he made all by himself.

"We have a winner!" said MattyB.

Paul Blart sat down. Johnny went up to Blart and told him what he heard at the Kool-Aid.  Blart decided to wait until and if Ian gets eliminated to take action.

Three rounds later, it was Cory's turn against his three other opponents.

"Go!!!" said MattyB.

"Cory looks to be using his tongue skills to kill for." said Osama.

"Be the watermelon" said Cory, "Be. The. Watermelon."

It did not take Cory longer than thirteen seconds to use his amazing tongue to liquify and drink the watermelon.

"Next round is Norman, Fat Spiderman, Stone Cold Steve Austin, and Shrek." said MattyB.

When they were told to go, Stone Cold bashed the watermelon on his head and spilled most of the juice, so he was disqualified.  Shrek's tongue was Hurricane Katrina in the watermelon, and he was using the tongue skills Cory had taught him.

"Look Osama." Khaled said, "Another tongue."

"Fat Spiderman fell on his watermelon! That watermelon got blown up!" said Osama.

While Norman barely finished fisting his watermelon, Shrek had drank all of the watermelon juice.

"Our winner is Shrek!" said MattyB. "Now we're moving on to Round 3.  Our remaining eight contestants will be put into teams of two to see who can eat the most watermelons in 40 seconds. All remaining contestants will participate neck-and-neck. The team with the most eaten watermelons will be advancing to a one versus one finals.  This is the semi finals."

"Team one will be.." Matty B put his hands in a bowl and pulled out two names. "Shrek and Joey Graceffa."

Team two and three were anounced. Everyone except for two people were called.

"Bboys and Bgirls, this means team four will be.." MattyB paused.  "Ian and Cory."

Again, Johnny heard Jared speak to Ian.

"Alright Ian, you got paired up with a veteran. If you fuck this up now, I will grab one hand, shove it up your ass and the other hand will go into your throat.  After that, I will interlock both my hands inside of you. So you better win this, you fucking fat sack of shit!" said Jared.

Blart was informed of this.

"Hey Joey, we have to win this, got it?"

"We will. With my skills, this is in the bag." said Joey.

On the other corner, Cory told Ian, "Okay Ian, you eat at a pace you think is fast.  I'm drilling through."

"Me too." said Ian. "I don't want to be punished by Uncle Jared."

With that, Cory got in his MLG try-hard mode.  When MattyB started the round, Cory and Ian both drilled through the watermelons taking down an average of one watermelon every five seconds.

"Look at Cory and Ian, Osama." said Khaled. "They just ate another one, and another one, and ANOTHER one."

Shrek and Joey were going quickly as well, but Joey unfortunately hit his wall 30 seconds in.

"I can't eat anymore, Shrek. I'm way too full. Sorry." said Joey.

Shrek realized if he won, it would be too easy for him in the finals, but he did not eat fast enough.

"Our winners are Ian and Cory with 18 watermelons.  That has to be a world record, Bboys and Bgirls!" said MattyB.  "We're immediately moving on to the final round.  All these contestants have to do is answer one question.  What is my favorite type of music?"

Ian raised his hand first.  "Your favorite type of music is Dub-step."

"No way, Dub-step is absolutely not swag." said Matty.

"You like Rap music." said Cory.

"Cory, you have just won!  You will be facing me in a three round gauntlet.  Let's take a five minute break and then get back to business." said MattyB.

"Paul, keep your eyes on Jared.  I'll block the exits." said Test.

Paul watched Jared.  He was going right for Ian.

To be continued... 



Bee Shrek Test in the HouseWaar verhalen tot leven komen. Ontdek het nu