Summer in Montauk

Yet Again, the House is Dusty

I pull up to the pastel blue cabin that has been sinking into the sand for years now. I have been coming here since I was a child, and this familiar house never ceases to clear any distresses I may have. Walking in, I look around. It looks the same as always, which is a small comfort. I walk through the house, breathing in the musty smell mixed with sea salt that comes with the house being desolate for an entire year.

A breath of sea air, the sound of the waves in my ears. Never do I feel more relaxed than when I am standing in this cabin. Since I was five years old and alone, I have never felt more safe than here, in the shadow of old childhood memories.

The cleaning process lasts an entire day. Cleaning is never fun. Whenever the house is empty, sand always seems to seep into the house, spiders make new webs, and dust and rust rise to cover every surface in the house. Every square inch of the house needs to be dusted, scrubbed, and cleaned every time I return, which is exhausting.

Before cleaning, I go outside for some fresh air. It always helped me think. I grab a blanket and walked down to the beach. My fleece blanket drags along in the sand. I would not bother with the blanket usually, but it is raining and I would rather not get soaked in the time I was outside. I have always preferred blankets to jackets. They are more comfortable, and cover all of me instead of just my arms and torso. I have found blankets to be overall softer and fluffier. Even though they are harder to drag around, I find comfort in feeling engulfed and safe.

Sitting on the beach, I feel more solid, more connected to the Earth around me. My long hair whips into my face because of the strong winds, but that does not matter. It helps me feel in tune with nature. I love being anywhere outside, but the ocean is my favorite place to be. If I could take a tent and live on the beach full-time, I would.

I am lost deep in my thoughts when something... peculiar catches my attention.

This beach is usually empty, especially when it is raining. I did not mind sharing, but this was different. Up ahead, I saw a sort of glow. I wasn't  sure what it was, but it seemed unaffected by the rain altogether. In fact, the rain seemed to be repelled by the sea green glow.

The glow grew larger and brighter, but it did not seem hostile. It drew me in with a comfort that I had not felt ever since my parents died. I did not know whether I should have been scared or not, but the glow seemed to be pulling me closer, rather than pushing me away. I should have been scared, or at least wary, but the main emotions filling my veins were curiosity and comfort.