Asylum Romance (A Joker Story [Sequel to Turquoise punchline])

13: The Replacement

~*~ The Joker’s point of view~*~

“Darling, I need you to come with me, seriously,” I sighed, watching as my wife put earrings on and adjusted her long, blonde wig. 

“Nope, I’m taking Kellen shopping, he’s getting bigger and I want to see what looks cute for him.”

I groaned. “Just get a size larger like normal parents do,”

She turned away from the mirror and gently kissed me. “That’s the thing, though. We aren’t normal parents,” she lingered in front of me for a moment, gently letting her lips brush along mine, causing me to shiver slightly. “Bye.” she left, laughing as I cursed out loud, she had won by being charming.

Damn. That woman.

I groaned and looked around the house, trying to find a henchman to take along with me, but none of them had the slightest clue what to do with just me there. They all formed friend groups, and it seemed a little awkward to just take one, and I was not in the mood for more than one moron in my presence.

“Need something?”

I turned and found Gadget, dressed in her new outfit, the Steampunk dress, and looked away quickly. I had accidentally checked her out. But how could I stop? All men are programmed to look at other women, it didn’t mean I was going to cheat on my wife.

I turned back to her, she was awkwardly confused, watching me curiously, but I just shook my head and muttered under my breath, walking past her. 

Evangeline said I could bring her, though. . . .

I sighed and turned to Gadget. “You’re coming with me.”

She was even more puzzled now. “What? Why?”

“Because I have a job to do, and Caerulea told me I could take you along,” I realized I had to be more assertive, and stepped forward, staring at her with a very strict expression. “Don’t question my authority.”

She shrank back, which made me very happy that I had the upper hand. I loved having power. I turned and walked outside the door while she followed. 

“What are we doing?”

“I’ll tell you when we are in the car,” I replied, jumping into the driver’s seat of my van, adjusting my seat, snickering to myself. Gadget scrambled into the passenger seat clumsily, her wide eyes staring at me until I sighed and turned to her.

“So?”

She was starting to annoy me. “Okay, what we are going to do, bear with me while I say this, is visit the GCPD building and tell them that we are planning to do something in two weeks time.” I spoke slowly, she scrunched her nose angrily, knowing I was being mean about it.

“So we’re going to trick them,”

“Good job,” I started the car. She let out a sigh.

“I need a weapon,”

“Then grab one when we arrive there.”

“But I need a moment to choose and make sure I–“

“Just grab a fucking weapon,” I groaned. “Don’t be so complicated, I doubt you’ll need it since we will be surrounded.”

“Risk taker, I see,” she murmured.

“Why do you think they call me crazy?” I laughed, starting the car and driving off to the GCPD building.