Lost | C.H. Fanfic | Complete

Chapter 27

I went home after we messed around in the park for a bit longer. I walked in and saw a note on the kitchen counter, along with a lot of cash.

Jessica, this is for your food for the month. If it runs out before I'm back, that's your problem to solve. How thoughtful...

I went up to my room and took off my shoes and hoodie. Oh crap, Calum's hoodie. I'll give it to him at school.

I flopped onto my bed and took out my phone. A message popped up on my screen.

Cal: Hey, I hope you're okay. Had fun at the park :)

I don't remember giving him my number, and he never gave me his number.

Jessica: Hey stalker, how'd you get my number? Lol

Cal: That's classified information, I'm afraid.

Jessica: You stole it when I slept over didn't u?

Cal: How'd u know?

Jessica: That's classified information, I'm afraid.

Cal: Haha I see what you did there

Jessica: I accidentally your hoodie

Cal: My favourite hoodie! How dare you?

Cal: You should know, if I were there, I'd be glaring at you rn

Jessica: If you were here, you'd have your hoodie, genius

Cal: You win this time, Ellis

Jessica: Oh, this won't be the last time I win, trust me Hood

Cal: I gotta go :(

Jessica: Bye weirdo :D

Cal: Bye Jess :)

I locked my phone and put it down, a smile on my face. I got into my pjs and got into bed, not hungry. And thanks to Calum, I fell asleep with a smile on my face instead of tears.

But that didn't last long. I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing and saw that only an hour had passed.

I picked my phone up and saw a number I wasn't expecting. My ex-best friend back in England's mom was calling. Why would she be calling me at this hour. Oh wait, time differences. I'm still not used to that.

"Hello?" I answered in confusion. "Jessica honey..." her familiar voice said through the phone. It sounded like she was crying. "Is everything okay?" I asked in worry.

I heard her sniff. "Jessica honey, Kaitlyn's-she's dead" she said before she broke down in tears. "What? No. She can't be-what happened?" I asked, fully panicking now.

Kaitlyn may have left me alone at school to become friends with the popular girls, but she had been my best friend for 7 years.

"She overdosed on pills last night. We found a letter and in it, it said she was sorry-" she started but she started crying again. "She's sorry for leaving you alone at school when she found out about your self harm, and she hopes your life in Australia is going well" her mom said through tears.

Tears of my own were falling down my face. This can't be happening. I remember everything from that chaotic week vividly.

Kaitlyn found me in the school bathrooms, cutting. She called me a freak and left me. Two days later she tried to kill herself by slitting her wrists.

When she came back to school, I had said horrible things to her. I told her how she only did that for attention and that it was a real problem. I didn't know she was really suicidal. It just seemed like attention seeking, seeing as I was the talk of the school. The freak.

And now, 4 years later, her mother was on the phone with me, telling me how my best friend was dead. Gone. Forever. It's probably all my fault.

"I'm so sorry...I wish I could be there for the funeral. I send my love" I said through my tears.
"Thank you love. Wish you well" she said before hanging up.

I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and ran a hand through my hair. I had nothing to do or say. I just cried. I fell to the floor in tears and wailed. Now everyone from home is gone and there's nothing bringing them back.

I eventually pulled myself together and stood up. I looked at the time. 1am. I've been crying for hours.

And just like clockwork, the urge to cut myself came back. And I was too sad to fight it. So I went to the bathroom, got out my razor blade and started to cut.

The cuts weren't deep but they weren't shallow either. There were too many to count once I was done. All along my arm were red gashes.

I stared at them and fell to the floor, landing in the pool of blood. Blood was everywhere. "What have you done?" I asked myself out loud. Idiot.

So I decided to do something that would actually be good for me. I called Ashton.