Part 5

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  Hands are silent
Voice is numb
Try to scream out my lungs
It makes this harder
And the tears stream down my face

'You are worthless'

'waste of space'

'They don't like you'

'They are just pitying you'

'You are just for them to screw,both mentally and physically.'

'A toy,just a toy.'

'Nothing.'

'They don't love you,never did.'

'Look at how they are with each other.They don't do that with you.You don't deserve it.'

'You are a murderer.'

'They will leave you.'

'Or you'll kill them.'

A broken sob left his battered lips.The voices in his head were right.He did not deserve it.He will never deserve it.They are too good for him.They are happy that he is giving them space.

It hurts.It hurts more then anything.But he deserves it.All of it.

It was snowing,the snow already up to his knee.His lips were turning blue,legs numb but he kept walking.He needed to do this.To keep the boys safe,to get them out of their misery.

"Come on sunshine,Just a little more.You are brave.You can do this.Do this for them.You couldn't save us but you can save them."He saw his mother standing right next to him.She was exactly the same like them last time. Her hair flowing in her face,the snow making her face translucent.

"Yes,we'll help you when you get there.We want your boys to be happy and live."He looked at his left,where his dad stood.His dad had a determined expression on his face. That expression made Zayn want to do it more then ever.Maybe he could do this for the boys.

"But it's cold."He stuttered out his chapped lips.

"It was snowing when you led them to their death,it is only fair if you die when its snowing.You should be able to feel what they felt."He looked at his old self who stood right in front of him,a accusing look on his face.

He kept walking after that.In the snow,with barely any clothes on. His eyes burned as the strong wind slapped across his face.

"Yes Zayn. Maybe they'll remember you for this."He heard his own voice motivate him.

Zayn's body was completely numb,his voice turning to a mere whisper.He wanted to cry out,in exhaustion,in despair and in desolation.He wanted to yell.Yell at himself for being the self absorbed crap he had always been.Yell at his fate for taking everything from him,just to give him everything and then making him feel like this.

Zayn was torn and tired but he didn't stopped walking.

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Hi guys

It's Zayn's birthday and I am not going to talk about it or else this'll be too long.

So wait for IGYMH update today and also if there are enough comments on this I'll update this again today!

Tell me how u like it make me love you.

Vote.Preach.Comment Love Zayn.



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