Remember the Time

12: I Can't Help It

Alessandra finds herself internally melting at his touch. His lips were so gentle, soft, and sweet; his hands gently caressing her waist. Suddenly, she is rudely awakened by reality and breaks their kiss. Michael is confused. "What's wrong?"

Alessandra clutches her kneecaps, taking a sigh. She hangs her head. As Michael moved closer, she inched further away. "Ali..."

"Um...I'm sorry," she looks to the right.

"Was I too forward?" he asks with genuine concern.

"No, no. That's not it, I---"

"What?" he leans in, looking at her even more intensely.

"I just—"she gets up. "I can't. I just can't."

"Wait, I don't understand?" A hint of disappointment is etched on Michael's face.

"It's not you..."

"Then what is it, Alessandra?" He stands up, facing her.

"I just need a minute—to myself." Ali turns to walk away.

"Ali?" Michael begins to follow, but Alessandra puts her hand up, stopping him.

"Please?" She asked softly.

"Okay." Michael retreats with a whisper. He watches her walk toward the back of the guest house. Michael takes a sigh, and patiently waits, pacing with hands on his hips.

Alessandra, now at the back of the guest house, leans against the wall, catching her breath, her eyes watering just a bit. Her thoughts:

God, he is so kind, handsome, smart, charming, sexy, generous...He's so amazing. Any woman would kill to be by his side. What's going on? He's my best friend. This can't be. What if it doesn't work out? What if our friendship will end? I know he cares about me, and I care about him. But what if this is a big mistake? What if things change? I can't hurt him. I can't risk losing him. What if he runs away like the rest? What if he'll stay...what if we can do this? Maybe we are more than friends? Maybe we...

Alessandra's thoughts are interrupted when she sees Michael approach her from the side of the house. He sympathetically and carefully approaches her. "I know you said you needed time alone, but ..." He admits. "It's getting a little chilly out here and I just had to check on you. I don't want you to think I'm pushy or..."

"No, no, you're not, and I'm fine I just...it's just a lot." She folds her arms rubbing them.

"C'mon, let's go inside," Michael suggests as he ushers her back to the main house.

______________________________

Michael and Alessandra are in his master bedroom, sitting on his windowsill seat across from one another. Michael's back is against the pane, as he looks intently at Alessandra, who is gazing out at the moon before them. "What are you so afraid of, Ali? You know I wouldn't do anything to hurt you, right?"

Alessandra puts her head down, playing with her fingernails. "I know."

"Then why are you acting this way? If it's the way I came on to you—"

"Michael, you did nothing wrong—"

Michael's voice raises a bit. "Well, it's sure as hell starting to feel like it. I don't know. It's like you are fine with me one minute, then running from me the next!"

"I can't expect you to understand." Alessandra folds her arms defensively, even though she understands his frustration.

"Try me." He pleads.