Memoirs of a discontented teen

Chapter 13

"Don't apologize, we're even.", she said with twisted lips.

"What do you mean.", I asked.

"I kind of went on a rant telling everybody how childish you were being."

"I hate you.", I lied. I loved her in spite of her foibles.

Carlos opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by the waiter carrying my food. "Cheesy chicken and mushroom lasagna and a coke" she said placing the food items in front of me with a smile mirroring the expression on my face. The aroma of the lasagne wafted around our table and beckoned me.

She turned to Malia and Carlos while taking her notepad and pen out of her pocket and asked if they were ready to order. They both shook their heads, "No we're good, thanks", Malia spoke up to the waitresses who nodded and left.

"Hungry are we?", Carlos questioned with a  smirk, looking at the large portion of food on my plate. All I was focused on was the cheese spread on top in copious amounts.

"Yeah, haven't eaten all day actually." I said digging into the lasagna. I had no need for pretentious manners.

"Where'd you go after your exam?", Malia said, inspecting her nails. They were long but in a nice way, almond shaped and painted black; simple. Unlike Asia's, her nails were like a real obsession with her. Given half a chance she would go into rapture about her new nail job. I couldn't care less but nodded I enthusiastically and said "So cute." at the right moments.

Putting my fork down, I cleared my throat, wiped my mouth with the napkin and pushed the
long flopping piece of hair from my eyes. "That's actually what I want to talk to you guys about.", I said. "I've been going to this guy's house after exams to study and chill."

Carlos sat up from his chair, leaned in and asked, "Do we know him?"

"He's the guy from Nassau's party. He drove me home?", I explained.

Malia looked up at smirked before asking, "Oh really? Zakari West?" I gave a small hesitant nod and took a sip of my coke.

Malia gave a dismissive wave of her hand and asked, "Wait, he has a girlfriend though right?"

I nodded again.

Carlos held his finger up to his lips while Malia's brows bumped together in a slight scowl. "Do you have anything to confess?", she asked.

"Okay. I-I didn't know he had a girlfriend until today, an-and then I just lost it when he told me, then we started making out from nowhere but I left before anything could happened because I felt really bad.", I stammered, sinking into my chair.

"That is the most selfish, dirty, low down to the ground thing that I have ever heard. That's just the truth, and I feel like it's my duty to tell you what I know.", Malia stated, running her hand through her hair.

I hadn't prepared for this. Malia was known for her brutal honesty that tested most friendships but I appreciated it. She was generous to a fault and her loyalty to her friends was fierce.

"I know that, I wouldn't have been seeing him this entire time if I knew that he had a girlfriend."

She pursed her lips and looked away as if the information was of no importance.

I looked to Carlos for help and his face softened into a smile.I loved the fact that he listened without judgement, never commented until I'd spun my heart out or asked him to speak up. He cleared his throat and asked, "Is he a good kisser?"

I nodded and smiled widely, replaying the time he kissed me the thousandth time, feeling my cheeks flush.

"Do you like him?"

I nodded again.

"Then just go to him and be like, Hey I want this relationship to work but in order for that to happen I need you to break up with your girlfriend. Either you do that or I need to move on to something else. If he doesn't you need to put your money where your mouth is and get gone.", he sassed

"Don't encourage her to be a homewrecker Carlos. Right now she's being the girl we're supposed to hate.", Malia said holding up her palm towards me.

"True, but I don't want to see her being the beta version to somebody else's alpha. I could be a cliche and tell her that they're plenty other fish in the sea but fish are fish and they all stink. We're living in the Darwinian theory hun, only the fittest and meanest thrive."

He winked at me and then we both laughed.

Malia rolled her eyes at us and said to me, "Wow, the irony. You needing to be with someone else has you becoming someone else."

"Look M, I didn't plan for this to happen, I know you're mad because we've both been at the other end of the spectrum and it hurts like shit but I haven't even decided on anything. I was actually hoping that Carlos would talk me out of it but he brought out a pretty good point."

"It's not just about you though, what about his girlfriend?", Malia asked tilting head and crossing her arms to her chest.

What about her?  I thought, resting my chin on my hands trying to refrain from rolling my eyes.

"And have you thought about the repercussions that'll come with you choosing him? Is he more important than your dignity and self respect? It's like you're bluntly admitting to being the third party and it looks like you couldn't care less."

"I think it's just her lack of companionship that's fueling her desire for him. In other words Victoria here is just thirsty for days!", Carlos said while leaning back into his chair.

"She doesn't need companionship right now though, she just needs to get comfortable with being alone for now.I get that she was left feeling vulnerable and wounded after Jaheem. And there's no shame in feeling hurt. I just think it's way too early for her to be worrying about some guy." Tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear ,
Malia turned to face me and continued, "Happiness can not be pursued it can only be ensued. I'm not going to watch you put your heart on the line and get your heart dismantled. Karma is a bitch. These things will loop back around with vengeance later."

"Alright enough said.", Carlos chimed in, playfuly slamming the palms of his hands on the table , making the utensils rattle. I picked up my fork and continued eating.
"I need to get back home and study. V, just take all that we've said into serious consideration and evaluate whether the risks are worth it and act accordingly okay?", he added, while getting up from his seat.

My head is spinning faster than a helicopter blade and my brain is constantly searching for a sign. I am so lost in constructing scenarios for both of the options that are before me. All I can ask myself is do I feed my inner angel and walk away from something that could be right for me? Or do I feed my inner devil and ride this demon dragon to new highs of cruelty?

I give Carlos a quick nod and take the last bite of my lasagna. My eyes dart around the room looking for my waitress who smiles when she sees me and starts taking long strides towards me with the check book in her hand, weaving through the crowd of people that had just ambled into the cafe.

"I can't believe you ate all that, the mushrooms here taste like ass crack.", Malia said louder than she should have.