04 | remnants of him

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Is it bad that I miss him?

❝Is it bad that I miss him?❞

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WHIR...SNAP! Ria lowers her camera as the image of her friends posing for their new album cover loads on the diminutive screen.

"You've yet to give us a valid explanation," Sophia springs back to the conversation Ria was keenly trying to avoid.

Regret tugs at the pit of her stomach. Telling them about her short-lived adventure with Ashton is feeling more and more like a mistake. "There's nothing else to say," Ria mutters, ignoring the disappointment in her friend's expression. "I just don't want to get attached to him."

"It's too fucking late for that." Sophia hops from her spot next to Jared against Ria's makeshift backdrop, a black blanket hung across the wall of her spare bedroom. "What kind of one-night stand has meaningful conversations? Actually, you didn't even have sex. You just talked all night until you fell asleep." She drives her fingers through the frizzy blonde locks that cloud around her shoulders, reacting as if this is some otherworldly phenomenon. "You've found a diamond in the rough."

Ria's shoulders slump and her arms flop to her sides. "You're really making a big deal about a guy I talked to. That's it. There's nothing special about talking." Yet as the words leave her mouth she's screaming liar inside her head. Talking to Ashton was a breath of fresh air in a congested city. Being able to reminisce so shamelessly brought her the purest form of joy.

A dramatic groan rolls from Sophia's throat, and she turns to Jared who's been watching them in calculated silence. "You usually have something smart to say. Convince Ria that's she's become delusional."

"Jared," Ria warns and extends a finger in his direction, "don't try to convince me that I'm wrong. I just can't keep seeing him, okay?"

"Why?" He folds his arms and peers at her behind dark-rimmed specs. His tone is light and open, but the critical part of him is waiting to rip her answer to shreds; she can practically smell it radiating off of him.

She mimics his position and leans against the wall nearest the door, planning an escape route in case she needs to flee from his self-proclaimed wisdom. "I can't afford to date anyone in my emotional state."

Sophia waves her short arms in the air as if she were summoning energy from the heavens. "He didn't ask you out. He said see you." Tremendous emphasis is dropped on see as if that makes a difference.

Suddenly, Ria's camera becomes a far more interesting center for her attention. She shifts it around, examining the light scratches and worn edges. "You guys know how I am." The strength that she'd been summoning in her voice perishes as she admits, "It'll be just like him all over again. Ashton could end up charming me and using me, and I'll be too in love to notice. I don't want to get in over my head again."

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