Hotline Bling

Chapter 14

"So please explain it to me...cause I'm still kind of confused." Tonya said through the phone, her voice filled with sarcasm. "Why are you still fucking with him? He ain't going nowhere in life and you know he's only using you for sex, right?"

Essence sat in her bed, her chin resting on her knees. It was Friday night and Mona was fast asleep, the alcohol in her system long since inviting her into an alcohol induced coma. "I know."

"Then...I don't get it. What is it about him that has you so caught up? The last time I checked...you weren't even really all that into him."

Essence sighed, twirling a piece of her hair in between her fingers. She had lost interest in Tony ages ago. Heck, she was convinced that she never truly had feelings for him in the first place. He had just been another distraction, someone to fill the empty space where Roman had been. Where Roman still resided. She frowned, hating the direction of her thoughts. She hadn't heard from Roman in weeks. But she thought about him constantly and it only seemed to confuse her more. Her emotions were an enigma to her. She knew deep down that Roman could never be replaced in her heart, no matter how many distractions she placed in her wake.  

"I don't know either..." She said, "I'm not sure what I'm doing at this point." She was, of course, being truthful with Tonya. She didn't quite know what kept her going out with Tony. He didn't make her heart flutter. He didn't make her feel special or beautiful in any way. He used her to his liking and she let him but only to a certain extent. She hadn't seen him in little over two weeks and to suddenly get a call from him left her feeling dirty and misused.

"What about Roman?" Tonya asked quickly, catching Essence off guard.

There he was again, Essence thought to herself, she could never seem to truly escape him.

"What about him?" She asked back.

Tonya sighed in her ear, "Girl, come on. You know I love you, you're my sister, my bestie, my soul replica but sometimes you're blind to what's really going on."

"And what's really going on?"

"You're not over him and you all out here being loyal to assholes like Tony when you could be rubbing up on warm muscles like Roman."

Essence couldn't quite contain the laughter that escaped her lips. Tonya always had the best way of phrasing things.

"I don't want to talk about Roman. He's the past." She stated with clear uncertainty.

"Oh...okay and Tony is what? Your present? Oh, God I hope not...your future?"

Before Essence could answer her phone vibrated in her hand and she pulled it from her ear to look at her screen. She raised a brow at the text message that sat dormant in her notification box. She clicked on it and read the text message with interest.

Tony: I'm tryna come through, you up?

She frowned before sighing, "Tonya, I'll call you back."

Tonya sighed in her ear but said okay. "Goodnight and Essence? Think about what we talked about, okay?"

Essence stared down at her cellphone for a moment, contemplating her best friend's words. She honestly didn't want to think about Roman tonight. It was already hard enough to resist dreams of him. She clicked on her messages and took to using Tony as a distraction.

Essence: Idk...you been M.I.A. for how long now? Try again.

Her phone vibrated seconds later.

Tony: Naw, bae, I was busying for real. I got a new job n it's been taking up my time.

Essence: And? So what? You get a new job and then ignore me for two weeks?

Tony: Come on. I'm sorry.

Essence stared down at her phone's screen, a scowl on her face. She leaned back in her bed, staring up at the same ceiling that had been staring back at her for the last six years. She did this often, staring at the ceiling. Wondering what it was like to lay dormant and unbothered by the things around you. Sometimes she wished she were a ceiling...or maybe the ocean. Or a bird. How cliché, she thought. She was just another stereotypical girl with problems...albeit not everyday problems but issues nonetheless. She wanted the ability to fly away...to remain unbothered by the things that seemed to hurt her frail form so easily.

Her phone vibrated, knocking her out of her thoughts. She reached for it and opened the text message.

Tony: You tryna chill or not?

She sighed...her fingers pausing over the touch screen.

Essence: Come get me.

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Tony pressed his gun into Essence's side, "I ain't got nothing against you, baby. But you my meal ticket."

Essence stared at Tony with wide eyes, her voice gone. She stopped breathing entirely, her lungs crying out for oxygen. He poked her hard with the tip of the cold metal, "Breath."

She gasped for air at his command, fear having her bend to his will without pause.

"You gone be ai'ight as long as you do what I tell you to," he lied as he circled her. She was tied helplessly to the bed, her clothes gone all except for her bra and panties. He had ordered her to strip as soon as they were hidden away securely in the motel.

He stood, resting a hip against the bed frame, the gun in his hand large and shiny and new. He had a job to do and though he hated to kill Essence, a girl with her...merits was hard to find these days, but she was not only female he was kicking it to. He shrug his shoulders, pointing his gun straight at her. The cold icy tip of it grazing the skin of her forehead. She couldn't speak, her voice seemed to be totally gone at this point.

He pressed the gun closer and the voice she thought lost returned with amplified strength. She screamed at the top of her lungs, catching Tony completely off guard. He panicked for a second, his only reflect to shut her up. He smashed her square in the cheek with the butt of his pistol. His attempt to shut her up only quieted her for a second before she was screaming again, only this time in pain. Blood pooled inside her mouth, building at the corners before slipping over her bottom lip and dripping onto her skin.

Tears welled in her eyes but did not spill, for her fear far outweighed her pain. She screamed again only to receive the same blow. She could feel her cheek swelling as her teeth locked onto the inside of her cheek, catching onto her bottom lip, busting it open. The force of the blow had her falling onto the middle of the bed. A small puddle of blood forming inside her mouth. She stayed still in the bed, her eyes staring unseeing at the bed's head board. She had walked right into this. Her stupidity had finally gotten the best of her. This was the result of her constant running. If she had just faced her problems head on instead of finding ways to hide she wouldn't be here.

The sound of Tony cursing caught her attention and she turned in his direction. Her pretty face swollen and covered in blood. Her large doe shaped eyes were glossy with unshed tears of pain. Tony pointed his gun at her again, "All you had to do was be quiet. I didn't want it to be like this."

She merely groaned in response before lying her head back down on the bed. He put his finger on the trigger and Essence squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for the proverbial bang that would end it all.

Bang! She flinched but to her surprise she felt no pain nor did the darkness that she expected to enclose her appear.

Her head shot up and her eyes widened as she saw the source of the noise. The motel door had been kicked in. Tony turned on his heel, the gun in his hand pointed toward the intruder. Tony barely had a chance to blink before a bullet shot right through his forehead, busting the back of his skull open. Blood splattered in Essence's direction and she squeezed her eyes shut, turning her head as the blood landed on the wall, the floor and her naked skin.

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